Cleveland Town Topics Vol. 3 (January--June 1889)

              8 llUleeJtI~ 'Re"iew of $ockt~t 8rt ant> literature.
VOL. IlL-No. I. CLEVEVLAND, 0., JANUARY S, 1889. PRICE, SCENTS.
THREE IN ONE.
CA=IRA!
INSURANCE,
PHOTOGRAPHER.
J. F. WALL & CO.,
REAL ESTATE
EDWARD S. MEYER.
211 SUPERIOR STREET.
-AND-
~ATTORNEYAT LAW,~
43 WILSHIRE BUILDING.
Every citizen of Cleveland
should visit the great Paint­ing,
CHRIST ON CALVA­RY,
in the OLD BAPTIST
Church, corner Euclid and
Erie.
It is open every week day
day from 10 A. M. to 10 P. M.
206 SUPEIUOR STREET.
FUNNY!
TAILORS, CLOTHIERS.
VERY
'i'
Across the street is a clothing dealer who thinks he controls all the good
clothing made in this world. No clothing but his is fit to wear.
Up the street is another who thinks he has in his head
the only correct methods of doing business;
All other methods are "dead" wrong.
Over the other way is another clothing dealer
who would have you believe his prices are 30 per cent.
lower than all others. Queer chaps these clothing dealers. Good
fellows all of them. We think our methods best because we combine the
1St. We give you clothing as good as can be made.
2nd. We sell it at the lowest possible price.
3rd. We use the most honorable and approved methods in doing it.
This is why we are taking the lead in the TAILORING and CLOTHING
business of this city.
THE BUCKEYEI
Next week-Ricc's II Corsair:'
-HERRMANN.-
PARK THEATRE.
Gus HARTZ, Lessee and Manacer.
Week, commencing Monday, Jan. 7. Matinee
Wednesday and Saturday.
-The Little Electric Dattery,-
'--H. R. JACOBS'___.
CLE'::~;~~~s~~e~~;:~·prop.
Tb. only theatre in this city playing sterrinc
attractions at popular prlces. Matinees,Tuesday,
Wednesday, and Saturday. Box office always
open.-Week commencing Monday, Jan. 7, 1889.
The Charming Little Singing and Dancing
Soubrette,
KATIE HART,
And the Favorite Eccentric ComedIan,
ALFRED MCDOWELL,
In the laughable musical comedy success,
The Kindergarden!
Margaret Mather,
OPE~H~~~~:;.ee and Man.~or.
Three nit;hu and Wednesday Matinee, beginin§
Monday January 7.
Company of Comedians. New aDd origmal
music.
Next week-Florence Bindlev.
Purchased from Denman Thompson, Esq. Pro­nounced
a Laughing Success. New Songs,
Medleys, Dances, etc. Special Scen-ery
and Effects.
Jan. I.-Hallen and Hart.
Jan. 17-Minnie Maddern.
In Her Brilliant New Comedy, a Quaint and
Curious Pacture or Ohio Life, by J.
C. Macy Esq., Entitled,
Supported by J. B.Studley and a company
of prominent players.
. Monday Evening, - - - LEA H.
Tuesday Evening. - THE HONEVMOON.
Wednesday Matinee. - ROMEO & JULIET.
Wednesday Evening. MACBETH.
Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Saturday
Matinee.
.LIZZIE EVANS,
GEO. GLANFIELD.
Livery and Boarding Stable.
142 SIBLEY. TELEPHONE 3095.
COLU~D~~~P.~~~~.~~~~er.
POPULAR} 15. 20, 30 and 50c.
PJ.ICItS. -NO HIGHER.-
WEEK JAN. 7.
Matinees Wednesday and Saturday.
KENTUCKY * CA.NNEL
ROOM 5. CASE BLOCK.
SOLD ONLY BY
The Rhodes & Beidler Coal Co.
CLEVELAND, 0.
.8-13t
204 CEDAR AVENUE.
PHOTOGRAPHER,
*-E. DECKER,-'
L. SMITHNIGHT 8: SON,
1·····~····PH~jiMACY;···~·····:
.....................................................................:
Good accommodations for boarding horsel. Car­riages
and Coupes for operas, shopping, wed­dings,
calling, depots, etc.) at very cheap rates.
143~Euclid Ave.,
r SEALS. BADGES,
J. H. FLEHARTY &: CO.
Rubber Stamp.,Stoel Stamp;
Stencils! Burnln. Bruul••
A phabet., etc.
92 Seneca Street, • • CLEVELAND,-O
At SHAW'S,
93 Euclid Ave.
P. CENTEMERI &. CO:S KID GLOVE AGENCY.
-FOR-GRATES.
M"11" FRENCH 1 lnery ~~:~:;IC
,- : DREW'S DIME MUSEUM.
Week commencing .Monday, Jan. 7, 1189_
Open from I 1'6 ; and 7 to 10.
Frank and: Lottie Sinclair,
Sketch artistI, introducing the Krupp Gun Ar­tillery.
The l!:ccentric Comedian. .
Comprising the best Vaudeville people in
this and t1'e Old World.
Week Jan. I.-Rose .osborne, Cleveland's
favorite actress. in " Valefie."
HARRY WILLIAMS'
OWN SPECIALTY COMPANY,
-DICK HUME,-
The Funniest Man on Earth.
William Dockstaetter, Edward Evans.
BRYANT AND HOLMES,
In their original Comedietta,
II Squibbs. the Poet."
The ,Gleason Children.
NEW CURIOS. NEw CURIOS.
TOW"N TOPICS.
We've laid aside two tables in this department, loaded them with
Boys' and Children's
OVERCOATS
Co.
THE STREETS OF CITIES AND TOWNS.
MANUFACTURERS OF
Ql:tl-WRITE FOR CIRCULARS AND PRICES."'*
-CONTRACTORS FOR-Harrison
· Many Lighting
COMPANY,
13 to 23 Davies St., • CLEVELAND, O.
Vapor Gas Burners, Fixtures, Torches, G:wo­line
and Oil Stoves, and all kinds of
Street Lanterns for Gas, Gas-oline
and Kerosene.
LIGHTIN·G
II. M. CLAFLEN, PRES.
CLAB~LEN PAVING
HUDSON •
And it wouldn't be out of the way to say that they are the finest ever
brought here. You'll agree with us the moment you see them.
The regular retail price runs from $12 to $ 16. On
another table we have Suits worth $10 to $15.
Now, parents, take your pick of these
-TABLES OF MAGNIFICENT GARMENTS,--
DELIBERATE SLAUGHTERl
Boys' and Children's
Choice $5.00 Choice.
ASTOUNDING REDUCTIONS IN UNDERWEAR!
This week we shall make Underwear fly! We've reduced the prices of all
the fine qualities wonderfully, and cut into the medium goods so that you
won't be able to go away without a liberal supply. Understand us­we'll
cut it deep!
Office, 29 Euclid Ave., OLEVELAND, O.
PAVING * CONTRACTORS.
Medina Block Stone Pavement a Specialty.
QUARRIES AT ALBION. N. Y.
II A person is known by the way they present themselves,"
T. C. SCHENCK & CO., . 10 Court Place. (Rear of Park Theatre).
PRACTICAL BOOK AND JOB PRINTERS.
H. H. BURG-.
TELEPHONB 147.
W. 1'. BURGESS.
BURGESS BROS.,
OtDce and Bank Fnrnitnret
DESKS. LETTER FILES. DOCUMENT
FILES, REVOLVING BOOK CASES,
LAW BOOK CAiiES, OFFICE
CHAIRS 1\ND SOFAS.
__.--..... Bank and Office Railing, Counters and:
Partitions a Specialty.
NOS. 118 AND 120 EUCLID AVENUE. CLEVELAND. O.
123 BANK STREET. TELEPHONE 2215.
* GET T:E:E EEET. * ALL THE LATEST DESIGNS IN
WEDDING, INVITATION, NEW YEARS' CARDS. CALLING CARDS,
INVITATIONS AND PROGRAMMES OF ALL KINDS.
.a:razee's Woodbine Laundry.
~MERCHANTSI~
With new machinery. With skilled labor.
With everything in shape to do the best of work.
-A TRIAL IS ALL WE ASK.-
We make a specialty of FINE AND ARTISTIC PRINTING,
and take pains with any class of work, no matter how small or how
large. It will not cost you any more to have your STATIONERY
printed in Fine and Attractive Style.
THE BEST WAY
BLANK BOOKS TO GET A FIRST-CLASS WATCH
MANUFACTURED TO ORDER.
IEir PLEASE GIVE US A CALL. ca
IS IN THE
CO-OPERATIVE CLUBS
LITHOGRAPH BUILDING,
COR. ST. CLAIR AND WOOD STREETS.
....TELEPHO.NE 852.
-OF-J.
T. Ainsworth Watch Olub Co.
FINE.VVATCHES
A~A~~Ep~~~~~T } ONLY $1.00 A WEEK.
ROOMS 31 AND 32, 117 PUBLIC SQUARE.
B 'Wlee~[\? 1Re\?iew of $ociet\?, Brt anb 'lLiterature.
VOL. IlL-No. 1. CLEVELAND, 0., JANUARV 5, 1889. PRICE, 5 CENTS.
found a pair that looked q"ite nice and were made to
order for some perverse person who afterwards decided
not to take them. And these he would let me have for
three dollars. So I decided to try them on.
I sat down and graciously extended my right foot.
"The left, please," said the young shoe·dealer, for
the proprietor himself was waiting on me. "I always
tryon the left foot."
And all forgetful of that yawning chasm in my stock·
ing, I let him take off my left boot. He deftly adjusted
the low shoe, and stood off to observe the effect. And
what an effect was there, my TOPICS! A number two
foot in a neat red slipper and black stocking set off by
an oval aperture-right on top-that looked as big :.nd
glaring to me as a full moon in a cold wintry sky.
There were people in the store, all around us, but I
collapsed right there, on the hench, only thinking to pull
my skirts over that hideous hole. But I got my foot out
of the slipper and into my own boot some way and had
pulled off three buttons trying to fasten it with my fin·
gers, when the shoe-man (no, shoe-gentleman, for he was
very nice under the circumstances,) captured my pedal
extremity, and buttoned the Dongola himself. I think
he was afraid to trust me with a hulloner for fear I
might stab myself with it-I looked so mad'.
He meekly suggested that the slippers seemed a nice
fit, and I said, "Oh, yes, lovely," (I'm sure I felt as
though I'd had a fit of some kind) and I told him that I
should probably send for them, but I didn't. .I don't
want any reminders of that awful experience.
My zeal for red shoes is gone.
I figured in
as the shoe
ildreil's brigh t
--'--
I have heard some good stories of
Last week was an eventful one for me.
another strange episode, not quite so tragic
dilemma, but had enough in its way.
Happening to glance out of an upper window-the
window of my boudoir where I was writing-I was sa­luted
by the familiar cry of" Banan' ". Feeling in need
of refreshment, I nodded to the Dago, and ran down­stairs,
porte·monnaie in hand, to patronize him. He
was a romantic but villainous looking specimen-make
you think of stillettos, vendetta salld all that sort of thing
-the, Art Club girls would give their eye-teeth to get
him for a model.
"Only twenta cent, lady, nice hanan'," said the Dago,
as I opened the storm-door.
I took half a dozen and handed the man a quarter.
Clang I-sounded a me!allic ring hehind me, the bananas
were snatched from my grasp, and a mad Italian went
rushing down the steps. Of course I rushed too, and
demanded either my money or the fruit and change. I
just seized his basket and clutl/{, while the man poured
out a volley of Sicilian expletives and equally unintelli·
gible Dago·English. "Give me my quarter!" I de­manded.
"Taka you' money! No wantarno wanta!" said the
Italian, trying to get away.
" Give me my money, you bad man! " cried I.
"I givn you 'man'! Taka you' bad man' ! " he kept
on until suddenly a light dawned on both of us. Then
he sullenly came back to the door and pointed to my
quarter serenely reposing on the hall floor where he' had
flung it over my head. I picked it up-a lead-colored,
chipped and dented, altogether disreputable 100kiIli
coin. Then I understood the Dago's wrath.
But, oh, what a sad lack of confidence he showed in
your Sallie. Do I appear like a person who would pur·
posely try to palm off a spurious quarter on a poor ven·
dor?
I found a dime for him which he took without further
objections, but he gave me a look of suspicion and re~
proach as he went away, that just makei,Qly heart ache
to think of.
money than is absolutely necessary, after I have pur­chased
a Hading veil and a set of furs (brown bear, they're
my style exactly).
lieso/wd, To refrain frolll indulging in nonsense at
unseasonable times, such as at church or when the young
minister is calling, and to neglect no opportunity for
cultivating my mind by attending first·c1ass theatrical
performances and concerts and by reading improving
hooks like "Robert Elsmere" and" How Men Pro­pose."
You see I have turned over a new leaf, and you don't
know what a relief it is to make up my mind to such a
proper course of conduct for this year. I have been so
subdued since yesterday that mother thought I was sick,
and made me some creamed oysters on toast for supper.
It is pl~asant to find that the path of the righteous is
not altogether a thorny one.
The fashion columns of the Eastern papers have been
draped in mourning lately. That is; they have been
sombre with accounts of the black lin/{erie that is worn
by some of tbe ultra-fashionables now-a-days. I wonder
if the descriptions can be true, or i( they are purely sen­sational.
Of course, we all wear dismal-hued hosiery, and there
are few of us who would reject a pair of black satin stays,
but wheu it comes to night-robes, underwear and petti­coats,
all of the same dismal color, why, it seems too
lugubrious for anything.
They say that these black garments are not relieved
by a tint of color anywhere. They are made of soft silk,
trimmed with stitching and edging of the finest thread
lace. Mrs. Frank Leslie in particular is quoted as pre­ferring
hlack to any other color in lin/{erie, and is said to
have brought several trunks full of sable underwear from
Paris in the Autumn. And not only underwear but
sheets, pillow·covers and couch draperies, all of black
satin, tucked and lace·edged. They say that Mrs. L.'s
couch presents a quaint and xsthetic picture with its
black coverings and dr1}po:ries of amber-colored lace. I
think it must look too wierd for anything. Well, itmay
be ;~sthetic and it doubtless saves in the washing,. but a
woman of refined taste must experience an awful revul­sion
of feeling before she can resort to black underwear,
and I'm sure I could never sleep a wink in a spectral
couch like that funereal affair of Mrs. Leslie's.
I had a thrilling experience last week.
You see, I had just three dollars and a half left over
from Cbristmas, and I wanted to put it "here it would
do the most good. Suddenly I bethought me of red
slippers. The very thing! So useful and so pretty for
home wear, to receive in, you know. The tan slippers
are chic, but with black hosiery they would make one's
feet black and tan, and that would be too suggestive of
dog·days for winter house wear.
So I hurried to put on my Dongola boots to go down
town, when 10, there was a hole right on the instep of
my stocking, It was only a little one, but a hole in a
black stocking is an indisputable fact. I was surprised
to see it there for I'm very particular about mending my
stockings, and mother always mends them over again
after me. But with my re,~dy wit alld good judgement
I reflected that the unsound stocking was on the left foot
and the shoes would surely be tried on the right.
So I started out with a clear conscience and three
dollars and a half in my pocket-book, out of which I
paid my car fare and purchased a quarter's worth of
marsh·mallo~s which were beckoning sweetly to me
1rom Candler and Judd's window when I got off the car.
Well, I had to try every down town shop before I could
find a pair of shoes to suit me. The shoes were plenty
enough, but my funds were not, as the red slippers nIl
footed up to at least three ~eventy-five. But finally I
Thal lIi~lll a cup found on his beat
A youth recumbent at his feel;
1-1 e looked down at that swelling hC:1d,
A nd sniffed, and winked, :1.nd softly said:
Schworcoff! "
If Stano fast! " :lrQse another cry,-
" YOllr luck at paslcbo:uds cOllie and try;
Come up and break a fat Jack POL "-
The young man murmured" I cannot-
Swore ofT."
SALLIE D' BRASSE,
"SWORE OFF."
" Hold on," the old man shouted, "let's
Have some cigars or cigarcttes."
The youth declined the proffered smoke,
Though only two short wortls he spokc-
" Swore off.
fI Oh, stop," the maiden cried, Hand call­Just
leave your banner in the hall,
And have some wine and J:linty cakc"­The
young man ga\'c his head :l shake-
" Swort: off."
The shades of e .... e were falling fa!\l
As through Superior street there p:lSsed
A youth who bore so neal ane.: nice,
A uanner new with this device
.. Swore ofT."
DEAR TOPICS :-I'm going to write you a cluek of a
letter to-day with my spick-and·span new Foulltain Pen.
It's a New Years gift from Gus Blankie (hless his appre­ciative
heart !), and he said that he hoped it would prove
a fountain of inspiration for me. I feel real set up about
receiving such a tribute to my merl'thes scriben"i (you see
the pen write~ Latin like a book), and it seems so IlIce
and masculine to carry a Fountain Pell. You will prob­ably
see me on the street corners or in places of amuse­ment
taking notes with my new weapon. When I Le­gin
to pose as an eccentric female, Anna Perkins will be
nowhere. By the way, TOPICS, I wish you to correct
the rumor that is afloat to the effect that the sylph-liye
Anna is the writer of the Sallie D'llrasse effusions. They
say that the eccentric Miss Perkins is hopping mad
about it, and she says there isn't a particle of real poetic
feeling in my letters.
This is hard, but I a>11 generous, and I don't want the
Berlin Heights muse to be annoyed any longer with
such libellous accusations.
Of course the first use to which 1 put my "Trommlitz"
was to indite a long list of January First resolutions. And
wasn't it rapturous to write without the aid of an ink
bottle? I couldn't refrain from h'lmming softly to my­self:
"Dip, boys, dip no more,
Bid farewell to the ink bottle bore."
But I was dism~yed to find that the mischievous thing
dated my resolutions with an obsolete 1888, just as any
willful old steel pen would have done.
I know you will be glad to hear ahout my highly mer­itorious
resolutions. I will give you a few examples so
that you may see how severe they are:
Resolved, To eschew all gum, Yucatan, Tutti-Frutti, or
any variety whatsoever, at public places of amusement
(the first syllable of the word "eschew" is rather faint,
but I shall remember what it me.ans).
Resolved, Not to make spiteful remarks about Maud
Spooner or any other engaged r;irl, or any girl who has
anything that I want and can't get.
Resolved, Not tQ lease mother for any Illore pocket-
sayings lately, and I'll let you publish them, although I
hate to lose them from my conversational stock in trade.
The precocious speeches of infants are splendid stimula
for small talk, you know, and I have revived a feeble,
flickering conversation when' it was at its last gasp, by
telling some remarkable speech that my nephew Ted
had made.
The first story comes right from Chica~o. A little
innocent of that big town (the idea of a little innocent
living in Chicago is not meant to be paradoxical), was
asked by an admiring elderly friend how old she was.
The child-a three-year-old-had not been taught to
remember her age so she naively answered,
" I don't know how old I am, but I know I'se almost
lIew! "
The other story is of a little girl in this city. She is
not yet six, but is the eldest of a family of three children.
The younger hrother and sister, aged two and four, were
playing in the yard one day when a friend of the family
who was calling at the house, asked where the two lillIe
ones were.
"Oh," came the unexpected answer from the five-year­old,
"Oh, they're out in the front-yard talking over old
times."
SALLIE D'DRASSE.
A POLICE COURT ROW.
Sigmund Goldstein has a vein of humor in his make-up
which he indulges sometimes to the annoyance of those
around him.
His clothes looked threadbare and greenish as he sat
in the dock of Police Court on Wednesday, but his eyes
twinkled merrily. He was charged with sleeping in a
hallway, and while awaiting trial another case was
called.
The fact that Sigmund, when a boy, was an ardent ad­mirer
of "Valentine Vox" will account, perhaps, for the
peculiar incidents which occurred when Hans Schneider
took the stand. Mr. Schneider charged Patrick Gaffney
with disorderly conduct.
"I haf got a leedle gat," began Mr. Schneider, "und
last night mein gat vas gilled mit dot man Gaffney."
"Phwat a dem lair!" exclaimed that gentleman.
"Bully for you, old man," said Judge Kelly.
"Can I believe my senses !" cried assistant prosecutor
Hull, in amaze. "lIere is a respectable m.<n says the
defendant killed his cat; the defendant calls him a liar
and your Honor backs him up."
"I never said a word," gasped the Court, "and I will
fine anyone who uses improper language here again."
"You won't do anything of the kind," cried a voice
among the caurt loungers. "You're an old gas bag. lIa!
hal ha!"
"Officer," roared the infuriated judge, "bring that
man before me this instant."
Patrolman Schnearline made a rigid search but every
one protested his innocence.
"Yow_yow!"
"Je-rusalem!" yelled 1\-1r. Hull, jumping to his feet
and kicking at an imaginary dog under the table. "Get
out, you brute!"
A series of yelps followed, but no dog materialized.
"This is getting serious," remarked his honor, as he
mopped the perspiration from his brow. "Somebody is
triHing with this Court, and if I find-"
"Meaow! meaowowow! mawow!" came from the waste­paper
basket.
He kicked the basket but no cat have in sight.
"Mr. Clerk, pinch me," the Judge implored; "I must
surely be sleeping."
Clerk Merchant pinched a piece out of the judicial ear
with a scissors, which convinced his honor that he was
not dreaming. "Proceed with the examination," he said,
wearily.
"I vas in no hurry," retorted Schneider, the witness.
"Well, I am, sir, and I will commit you for contempt
of Court if you do not proceed."
At this moment a piercing shriek ascended, appar­ently
from the lungs of a lady in the waitin~ room. The
officer rushed out, but found only a Chinaman content­edly
smoking a punk cigar.
.. This beats me," muttered the prosecuting attorney;
.. but we must get through somehow. Mr. Schneider,
why did Mr. Gaffney kill your cat? "
.. Veil, he say der ~at geep him wake nights, und he
ahot him mid der gun last Sunday night."
.. Did you see him do it? "
.. No, but I vas sure, because der gat vas dead nexdt
day."
.. HowlY mither of Moses," interrupted the ,defend­ent,
.. is the word of a shape staler to be took for truth? "
TOWN· TOPICS·
Mr. Schneider sprang up, purple with rage. Raising
a huge club, he cried: "You galled me under sheep
stealer," and flung the club.
It struck a stalwart police officer in the stomach, but
produced no impression.
"I wish to state," said Mr. Gaffney, .. that I never
opened me mouth to spake a word .ince I carne into
court. Somebody has been imitating my voice."
The judge looked incredulous, and the audience
laughed.
As order was being restored a loud snore carne from
the benches: Policeman Schmearline seized a meek·
looking citizen, and hauled him before the judge.
"Five dollars and costs" said his Honor, and the
astonished man went below, wondering what he had
done to merit punishment.
Sigmund evidently thought his ventriloquism had gone
far enough, for he subsided, and for awhile things went
along smoothly.
1\11'. Gaffney testified that Schneider poisoned a fowl
belonging to him some time ago, and he retorted by kill­ing
his cat. He thought he was about even.
"J shall dismiss the case," said the Court, "as I
think--"
A low, but blood-curdling moan came from under­neath
his chair, and the sentence was never concluded.
His lIonor sprang up, seized his hat, and ran from the
court-room. As he reached the door a mockin~ voice
began to sing, "Rock-a-bye, baby," and then wierd
laughs rent the air.
In the afternoon some one told the court that Gold.
stein was a ventriloquist, and that he had caused all the
trouble.
As a sequel, it may be added that Sigmund's address
will be Hotel Patterson, Woodland avenue.
At least, it would have been, if the case had happened,
for Judge Kelley is no respector of person and ventrilo­quists
have no "JHlll " in his courf.
ALL THE FASHION.
" I wahut er fawshionaybie ovahcoat, something vewy
late, dontcheknow?"
"Yes sir. Did you wish one too short, or one that's
too long?"
THE STORY OF A CRIME.
AN EPISODE INVOI.VING TWO JARS.
I am not a man who delights in games of chance.
The insidiously indiscreet advertisements of the Louisi­ana
State Lottery have no allurements for my soul. J
do not play poker, I never buy pools. Boston-bred, and
of old New England stock, I am of an intensely practical
nature and trust nothing to luck. In business affairs, in
love, in church, in all my d0!TIestic relations, I have been
credited with showing excellent common-sense without
a taint of romance.
How, then, did it happen that I fell a victim to the
bean jar? I cannot say.
One day, a day I can never forget, I was passing along
St. Clair street when I noticed a jar standing in a win­dow.
Impelled by a curiosity which was entirely foreign
to my nature, and I can in no ~ay account for, I paused
and examined the jar. It was apparently an ordinary
~Iass vessel of the sort favored by ladies who preserve
fruit, and it was filled with beans. I am from Boston,
as I have said, and on no other hypothesis save that at
my birthplace can I account for the mad infatuation
which seized upOn me as I looked at these imprisoned
beans. I flattened my nose against the chilly window-pane
and stared at them for several minutes. There
was a slip of dusty paper laid across the cover of the jar
and this was held in place by what appeared to be dabs
of brown sealing-wax. I did not step into the office to
ask the meaning of this mysterious jar; the idea, in fact,
never occurred to me. Reluctantly I tore myself away,
but even after I had reached my place of business I
could not keep my mind off of that enchanted jar.
At the dinner table that day, I alluded to it in a casual
way, and my eHest boy, Emerson Aldrich, promptly
explained that it was a bean-guessing jar and that cer­tain
money prizes went to the persons who were able to
guess the number of beans it contained. He added that
these prizes were' offered by the' proprietors of a certain
weekly paper, aud upon my expressing some interest in
the matter, he cut from the paper and gave to me the
advertisement, which J appeared to have overlooked,
although it had been in many issues of the journal. I
put the clipping in my pocket and when I reached my
office J read it over carefully.
There was a prize of $25 offered to the person who
guessed the exact number, aud lesser prizes for those
who guessed near to it, and an insane impulse swept
over me to enter the competition. It couldn't have been
the amount of the prize which thus tempterl me, bccause,
fortunately, I am in very comfortable circumstances. In
fact, I can only account for it on the supposition that the
beans must have exerted some mysterious influence over
me, as a Bostonian, which robbed me for the time being
of all myoid-time hard, practical sense. Aflyway, I put
on my hat and walked up town, and look~~{ - 'the magic
jar again. It was standing just where it' efore, and
three small boot-blacks were gazing at it in open-mouthed
interest as I approached. I felt a sudden ana unacconnt­able
jealousy of the boys. What right had they to be
staring at and estimating the Humber of t!tose sacred
beans? I
I had determined 10 win the prize myself, and I felt
that I woult! brook neither interference nor competition.
I waited until the urchins had gone, and then I carefully
sized up the jar and its precious contents. I remained
looking at it until I feared attracting comment, and then
I slOWly walked away repeating the advertisemeat over
and over again, and making abstruse estimates of the
grand bean total.
I went to bed, firmly convinced that I would dream
of the lucky number. But I didn't. Instead, bean-jars
in endless files marched up my body and acroiS my face,
each one, as it passed, tripping on my nose and spillin~
it contents in my eyes and ears. All night that cold,
clammy march continued, and all night I listened to the
rattle of the falling beans. I awoke next morning, far
from feeling refreshed, but I found time during the day
to go up three times to look at the jar.
On my third visit I had an inspiration. I got the pro­portions
of the jar firmly fixed in my time, and then I
hastened aud purchased one which I considered an exact
duplicate. Then I hought a hag full of beans, and tak­ing
them to the office with my jar, I gave orders to my'
bookkeeper to admit no one to my private ro()m. There
I counted the beans one by one and placed them in the
same orde~ in the jar. I filled it quite full and found
that it contained jnst two thousand and three full,slzed
beans and five slightly undersized ones. I at once deter­mined
to send in the number two thousand and eight as
my guess.
That night I went to bed feeling quite jubilant and
hopeful. My sleep was undisturbed save by the four
figlHes I have mentioned, mounted on spider legs and
dancing a furious tarantelle on my devoted chest. But
in the morning my nervousness all came back to me. I
began to fear that I had not hit upon the exact num­ber.
I went up and looked the prize jar over once more,
and realized 'at once that the difference of a hair's breadth
between my jar and the other would deprive me of the
prize. I walked away feeling very blue. Four times
that day I revisited the window and every time I came
away feeling still more hopeless.
After the last visit I retired to my office and sank
dolefully into my eas)" chair. Suddenly, as my gaze fell
upon the jar which I had filled, I started up. A terrible
temptation presented its~lf. It was the whispered s,ug'
gestion of a fiend. I felt that the shadow of a great
crime was upon me. What was more I hadn't the moral
courage to shake it olf.
The evil inspiration which had flashed upon me was
this: Why could I not substitute my jar for the one in
the window? -
I thought of this shameful suggestion for days; it was
constantly with me. I lost flesh; I grew irritable. My
family noticed iti- my wife asked rqe to'consult it. doctor
I laughed a hard, sneering laugh at the advice. No
dot:lor could offer me a panacea.
Each day, of course, I visited the seductive window;
each day I came away more and more determined that
the puzzle should be mine. One afternoon I entered my
office and in a half hour of steady work had so dressed
up my jar that no man on earth t:ould have told it from
the other. The characteristics of the prize jar were so
burned into my brain that I had no trouble in reproduc­ing
all the little details of its appearance. Then I care­fully
hid away my jar and bided my time for several days.
The last day on which the guesses would be received
was the first of the present month. I waited almost until
the final day an,1 then wearing my hig ulster with my
jar in the recess of one of its roomy pockets, I strolled
into the office of the prize-offering paper.
A kindly-faced elderly gentleman standing at a desk,
looked up enquiringly as I entered. I knew that my
voice trembled as T asked permission to inspect the jar.
He granted it readily an,1 with a thrill of joy I clutched
the hean-filled heaut)'. Hastily I looked it over and saw
that I had imitated it exactly. Its very twin was repos­ing
in my pocket. Just then the elderly gentleman moved
to the rear of the office.
I hastily drew the Logus jar from my pocket aud
placed it heside the other. Even as I did so a great
,;'ave of remorse seemed to roll over me. A slight noise
caused me to turn my head for a second. Heavens!
when I louked hack the jars were still there, but I could
not tell which was which!! They were so exactly alike
that both original and counterfeit were hopelessly mixed
up. Great drops uf cold s\l'eat hroke uut on my fore­head;
my hand tremhled like an aspen. I heard the
elderly gentleman's footstep hehind me alld snatched up
one of the jars and thrllst it in my pocket. Then I turned
to him and stammered my thanks, and, with a half·choked
good-morning was again outside the door.
Without looking behind me I rushed along like a
guilty thing. That jar in my pocket weighed like lead.
I felt that I must destroy it, and at once. I hurried
down to the Viaduct and there, unperceived, I thIng the
cursedthillg illto the river Lelow. r saw it disappear
and then I In'cathed again.
I hall intcnded, of course, to send in Iny guess, a guess
which ShOltl.j cover the contents of the jar I had pre­pared,
but now the idea was an ahborrent one. No, I
have done mischief enough, bl1t until the contents of that
jar is officially announced, I cannot hold up my head
like an hone<;\ man. All day the awful doubt assails me
-did I, or di,1 I not, take the original jar? If the judges
find two thousand and three fair-sized heans and five
small ones, then I anI a felon. If they find any other
number, I am again a stainless citizen.
What is it ?
The genuine or the counterfeit?
CLEVEI '\NO, Jan. 3d.
BLAMING DOCTOR ASHMUN.
""liss .I"lIIillgsave-"1 see that Patti preserves her
heauty by frequent bathing. I wish I could."
Mrs. Clilllo/lsireel-"Why can't you?"
Mi$s.Jt:ll1Iiltgsa,·e-"It's all Dr. Ashmun's fault."
Mrs. Clillio/lsireel-"How so?"
Miss. .Imningsave-' '\Vhy, you know he says the lake
water is full of rotifers, and bacteria, and bacilli."
Mrs. Clinlollslr"eI-"\\'cll?"
11liss.lmllingsave-"Well, do you suppose I would take
a bath with all those bold things staring at me? Why,.
it makes me blush even to think of it."
NEEDS VENTILATION.
Every \Vinter, play-goers are reminded that there is
an abominable neglect in most of our theatres in the
matter of heating and ventilating. In some cases there
is gradual approach to asphyxiation going on every even­ing
which is only prevented from arriving at a general
prostration of the audience by the elosing of the perform­ance
before that point has been actually reached. There
is an increasing feeling of dullness and drowsiness from
the growing impurity of the air, and if the weather is
temporarily warm and damp the situation speedily be­comes
too uncomfortable to be endured.
The impoverishing of the atmosphere proceeds the
most rapidly when the curtain is down between the acts,
a fact sufficiently demonstrated by the grateful sense of
relief whi-;;h prevails for a few moments after it has been
raised. The refreshing and reviving effeet of the outer
air experienced on leaving the theatre shows clearly
enough the robbing of vitality that has been going on
inside.
TO"WN TOPICS.
Theatre managers owe it to the public to correct this
barbarism, and they will find it to their interest to do so.
Arrangements should be made which would keep the
thermometer in the auditorium at lea~t as low as 70 de­grees
Fahrenheit, and which, even in very cold weather,
would supply the needed quantity of comfortably heated
fresh air.
The neglect to care for the comfort of audiences when
there are already ways at hand for doing so ; it ean only
be explained on the groun,1 of the proverbial managerial
dread of a "cold aud ien.ce."
A HUNTING ADVENTURE.
II.
VIL
Si£
.I~ •
, ............-.- .
".~~V·a'
.­..
J" ..... ",(,•• ----'--
A Chinaman with. a gun is one of the queerest sights
in the world. In a Bank street shooting gallery, yester­day,
a slant-eyed heathen was holding a rifle at an angle
of 4S degrees alid endeavoring to perforate the wooden
5
heart of a dancing girl. He held the r'ifle in a very
gingerly way, as if afraid of it, and when the cartridge
exploded he shut both eyes and nearly jumped out of his
felt-soled slippers. The target was untouehed, but with
an Ah ~in smile the Chinaman left the place.
HE GOT EVEN.
A good story is told of a certain well-known lawyer,
who now has one of his daughters to manipulate his type.
writer instead of the winsome blonde who was formerly
a handsome piece of furniture in his office. The change
came about in this way:
One day his ten-year-old son wandered into his office
just as the legal light was examining a letter written by
the hired amanuensis. In order to read the letter it was
necessary for the lawyer to bend over the back of the
young lady's chair. The youngster looked at the parent,
took in the situation, and then said: "Pa, I want a
quarter. "
.. I'm busy now, don't bother me, boy," said the father,
and he continued to hang over the shoulder of the lair
typewriter and peruse the letter which she held in her
hand.
"Pa," said the boy again, "I want a quarter. You'd
better give it to me, and I'll clear out."
"Don't worry me, I tell you," said the father. ·"Can't
you see that I am busy?"
The youngster didn't say any more, but just hung
around the office. He looked out 01 the window, and
counted the white horses as they went by; he pasted a
row of notarial seals aeross one of the desks; he emptied
some cigar ashes into an inkstand and then thickened
the compound with mucilage, and did a lot of other mis­chievous
tricks such as will only suggest themselves to a
ten-year·old boy. But he kept a close watch on the gov·
ernor and the typewriter, and every now and then would
shrug his shoulders, as much as to say: "I'll get even
with you."
Finally, the lawyer was ready to go home, and taking
his little boy by the hand they walked to their modest
appearing but handsomely furnished residence. Very
!tttle was said on the way, and the father was evidently
nettled at what he considered the misbehavior of. his son.
When the family sat down to dinner he narrated the eir­eumstances
to his wife, and she sternly told the young
. man that if he could not behave himself she would nOt
let him go down to his father's office again.
The boy didn't seem to mind that much, and finally
said, as he balaneed his fork on his forefinger: "Perhaps
I was somewhat rude and impatient, but, mamma, if
you'd seen I'll. lean over that pretty typewriter and play
with her bangs and whisper in her ear, you'd have thought
he'd been glad to give me a quarter to get me out of the
way. I never knew how much pa ,,,as struck on her be­fore."
The youngster was sent away from the table in dis­grace,
and he subsequently received striking evidence of
a parent's wrath, but there was a130 an argument be­tween
the parents that resulted in the dismissal of the
fair typewriter the following day.
GENERAL HARRISON'S SHOES.
In view of the rumor-unauthorized, but believed to
be true-to the effect that President-elect Harrison would
probaLly polish his shoes on Sundays, after reachin~ the
White House, a TOWN ToPICS rpeorter felt that a few
interviews with prominent citizens would have a whole­some
effect upon the public mind. The interviews were
all solicited with a view to publication, and the inter­viewed
parties consequently talked freely and without
reservation of any kind. A careful consideration of what
they said will undoubtedly convince the reader that the
subject, while fraught with all the importanee natura1ly
attaching to a national topic, is not of iO grave a char­acter
as at first supposed.
eil)' Clerk Salm-No, Sir, I cannot look upon the mat·
ter in any other light than as a deliberate blow at the
b'lotblack fraternity. The hootblacks may be kids, but
they are none the less deserving ~'f sympathy and pecuni.
ary aid. Kids, in time, will vote-and vote often if the
time is sufficient. As a Democrat, I prutest against thi,
blow at the young blood of the nation.
Presidmt Cady-The commercial travelers have taken
no action in regard to the nlatter as far as I know. My
personal opinion is that it would be wise to let- General
Harrison go ahead in llis own way, and rescf-ve all crit !:
isms until he bas bad a fair chance. tJrummen nOY..r
black their shoes on Sunday-if there i, a booOli.elt
around to do it for them.
Assistant Dislr;d Att~ .DDdKt-1f th'blacking used
6
in the process is admitted free of all obnoxious custom
duties, or is made in our country, independent of the
unjust tariff system of pr'Jtectioll for capitalists, I am not
opposed to the General's blacking his shoes whenever he
sees fit.
Judge Blalld;'I-Thequestion involves more issues than
appear at first sil!:ht. In no plan of government are the
beauties of being governed so forcibly and so beautifully
illustrated as in the Federal Plan. If the head of a great
nation is resolved upon shining his shoes, is consent of
numerous petty boards of underlings to be asked? No.
Il only becomes necessary for him to lay the matter
before his cabinet, and in a few moments the policy of
affair can be discussed and passed upon. By n0 other
Plan could a safe and speedy conclusion of so momentous
a subject be so swiftly reached.
T"eaSllnr Kimberley-Our glee cluo is just now prac­ticing
on "Oh, Benjy, Shine Dem Shoes," and as a
Republican, I have no objection to stating that it will
prove an undoubted SUCCI'SS. At the same time it might
be well to remind our citizens that the time is up on the
20th-with no more extensions.
CA IRA.
Help the noble work along,
Try to make it go, sir,-
'Vetre big enough and old enough
To have a mighty show, sir.
Sweep the cobwebs from the sky,
And crush the world's derision;
\Ve can have it if we try,-
A
Lakeside
Exposition!
From a thousand stacks we see
Smoke in clouds a-curling,
Hiss of steam and 'Icelric snap
Tell thousand wheels arc whirling.
Here's the stuff, sirs, right at hand,
To Will a world's decision;
.. Grandest show in all the lanrl­Tha.
Cleveland
Exposition!"
BUCKEYE PIETY.
A good story, which Dave Kimberley, the jolly county
treasurer delights in telling, is one relating to a zealous
chaplail' of the Army of the Potomac, who had called on
an Ohio Colonel, noted for his profanity, to talk of the
religious interests of his men. After having been po­litely
motioned to a seat on the chest, the chaplain be·
gan:
"Colonel, you have one of the finest regiments in the
rmy."
"I believe so," said the Colonel in reply.
"Do you think," pursued the chaplain, "that you
ay sufficient attention to the religious instruction of
our men? JJ
"Well, I don't know," doubtfully replied the Colonel.
"A lively interest has been awakened in the -­[
assa~husetts," the parson went on to say. "The Lord
as blessed the labors of lIis servants, and ten have aI­:
ady been baptized."
"Is that so?" exci tedly cried the Colonel, and then
~rniDg to the attendant, added, "Sergeant-Major, have
teen men detailed immediately for baptism; I'll be
r--'-d if I'll be outdone by any Massachusetts regi­<
ent."
Among the many people who came to Cleveland to
lend the holidays was Miss Agnes B. Cahill, a young
~tress, formerly of this city, but now of New York.
(iss Cahill is an out-and-out Cleveland girl, her parents,
hom she was visiting, living on Huntington street.
he received her earlier education at the Collinwood
lI1vent, afterwards studying at the New York Lyceum.
lch rapid progress did she make that last season she
~d offered to her and accepted a position with the new
roadway Theatre stock wmpany, and the New York
~pers .have it that she sc~red a ftatteri~g suc~ess. 'It is
>w said that for the coming season M.ss CahIll will hold
leading place with one of the finest theatrical com.
lnies in the metropolis. Her many friends in Cleve­rd
wil1 wish her every success in her chosen profession,
Id look forward to the time when she will take her
lace nearest the head. She is an ardent student and a
lntle, unassuming young lady, characteristics which go
~ to make up the true artist.
E~,".i' pro.pect of another st'ar being added to the
I~J of'1u~inariesalready sent out .by our talent·pro­cti"
e .citY: Mis~ Eliza Sutton, a Cleveland young
, T. well-known here as a teacher of eloclltion. lately
TOWN TOP!CS.
gave a "hearth-rug" exhibition in New York, before a
select audience of critics and professional people, who
speak in the highest terms of her acting. Miss Sulton
was assisted by Mr. Alfred Ayres, who has coached a
number of successful actresses, but who pronounces her
talent superior to that of any of his former pupils, Rose
Coghlan not expected. Miss Sutton has devoted much
time and labor to earnest, faithful study, and her friends
at home will be glad to hear that she has received such
an encouraging send·off in setting out on her stage ca­reer.
A MODEL NEW YEAR'S CALLING CARD.
,-------------,
$180,OOO··CO",PLIMENTS OF" THE 6EA50N.
AT HOME.
JAN. In, 188'iL
BOUND TO CATCH UP.
L' til/alit terrible is abroad in the land. This time it
was a little girl, accompanying a young couple, and the
three were in a Euclid avenue car. The couple were
evidently engaged, and they whispered sweet nothings
to one another. Suddenly they were interrupted by the
question:
"Auntie, do you ever expect to get married?" from
the child.
"Hush, my dear," Whispered auntie, blushing.
The young fellow smiled and the passengers snickered.
The child persisted, .. I uon't like Gussie."
.. Why, Lily, you mustn't talk that way about your
sister," repl\ed the youth, feeling uncomfortable under
the riveted gaze of the passengers.
"That's all right; Gussie may be better than I am
now; but wait until she gets married, as she said to
mllmma last night she hoped to goodness would be soon,
then I WIll catch ill' to her."
.. Willson avenue, change cars" called the conductor,
opportunely.
t GENERAL H. H. DODGE. t
With the death of General H. H. Dodge, the city loses
one of its foremost citizens, a man ever interested and
active in behalf of his native town. At the age of nearly
four-score, he preserved his full mental faculties, and to
the last his thoughts were of others and for others. Mr.
Ernest Klussman, editor of the_ w..uhter am Eric, a son­in
·law of the deceasec', in an editorial upon the subject,
says of the late General: "Every inch a gentlemen, he
was integrity personified. The most modest of men, he
was ever noble in deed and thought, and the bond that
cemented him with his friends will reach far beyond the
power of the grave." General Dodge was justly esteemed
for his many excellent traits of mind and heart, and his
long life presents as pure and clear a record as the spark­ling
brook that tumbles down the mountain side. When
they carried him to rest, yesterday, they buried a good
man.
Miss Blanche Roosevelt, a famous American girl, is
said to be one of the most interesting girls in Europe to
talk to, and bids fair to compete seriously with Miss
Chamberlain's successes. It is doubtful if acelebrity has
appeareu on the other siue during the last ten years whom
she has not met. She knows every crowned head in
Europe. She has reminiscences of every court. She has
been feted in every capital, and she is the only person
living who ever attended a ball at Battenberg palace
without the previous formal presentation. She has some
literary reputation, but it is not this to which she owes
her remarkable position.
The Excelsior Club Ball, Monday night, ushered in
the new year with a great deal of fun and merriment.
The elegant ball-room was crowded, and the array of
handsome toi/dtes and jewels was dazzling. The next re­ception
of the Excelsior Club takes place on Monday
evening, January 28.
The" give-and·take" system in society has come to
the front in a very marked manner during the past few
Winters. It seemingly flourishes more in Cleveland than
in other American cities, or at least is more openly prac­ticed,
from the fact that the set of very rich people is
larger in.number here than elsewhere, and that society
has grown so large that many people who are determined
to keep .. in the swim" can only do so by exchangi~g
hospitalities.
The annual reception of the Union Club, last Monday
evening, proved a pleasant surprise to those in attend­ance.
The decorations, .whi,le simple, were none the Jess
tasteful, and ~he arrangement of potted plants and gar­lands
of evergreen was much admired. The attendance
was the largest of any reception yet given by the club,
and the young people, aided by two orchestras, did much
to enliven the staid and solemn proceedings recorded in
former years. The matter of admitti;'g newspapermen
was this year referred by the directors to the house com­mittee,
"with power to act," and the committee saw fit
to exclude the news-gatherers. TiellS, ehaeq 'tin d SO"
go"'.
Among the guests from abroad who attended the re­ception
were Messrs. 1" P. Campeau, Alfred Brush and
Edgar Lewis, of Detroit.
PerhaJ1sthe most elegant gentlemen's dinner of the sea­son
was that given Saturday, by Mr. H. P. Hussey for
Mr. J. G. Creamer, of New Vork. The other gentlemen
present were Messrs. W. n. Hale, J. ll. Zerbe, Judge
Sanders, Myron T. Herrick, G. lIoyt Pomeroy and Prof.
Michelson.
Miss Gertrude Baldwin, daughter of Mr. and Mrs. E.
I. Baldwin, entertained a large number of friends Satur­day
afternoon. Miss Sterling, of New York, received
with the hostess.
Mrs. Joseph A. Stone and Miss Stone, of Huntington
street, gave a lnrge dancing party last Friday evening,
in honor of their guests, 1\1 iss Vaillant anci Miss Porter,
of Ne\v York.
au Sr,turdayevening Mr. aud Mrs. Harry Green, of
Hayward street, in honor of Miss Mason, their niece,
entertained about fifty young people at progressive
angling.
I\lr. J. S. DickIe is sojourning at Mt. Clemens, to
recover his health, which, during a season of overwork,
has become greatly impaired.
l\-frs. Henry C. Ranney and Miss Katherine Ranney,
of Euclid avenue, gave a quiet but elegant dancing party
Saturday evening.
Mr. and Mrs. Dan P. Eells, of Euclid avenue, gave a
large dancing party vVedne3uay evening for Miss Emma
Witt Harris.
Mrs. S. II. Chisholm gave a drive whist on Wednes­day
for Mrs. McGregor, of New York, who is visiting
with her.
About thirty young people were entertained by Mr.
Arthur Huntington New Year's night at the Roadside
Club.
Mrs. H. l\i. Hanna and Miss Hanna, of Prospect street,
gave a large and elegant dancing party last evening.
Mrs. James F. Tracy gave an "·At Home" yesterday,
for her sister, Mrs. D~. \Vl1liams, of Atlantic City.
. I\liss Billings gave a Hearts party on \Vednesday after­noon,
and a calico party on Thursday evening.
In Mrs. Mona Craig's" progressive marriage" system
very few participants could expect to win prizes.
The proudest father in town is Mr. W. C. Stahle, of the
Union Club. Young Mr. Stahle is well, thanks.
Miss Billings gives a Twelfth Night party to·night for
her guest, Miss Helen Ford, of Troy, N. Y.
Mrs. George W. Short and Miss Short gave a drive
whist for ladies on \Vednesday afternoon.
Miss Berdan, of Toledo, is visiting Miss Daisy Stocking,
of Prospect street.--------
Mr. Guy B. Johnson, of New York, is visiting Mr.
Orlando Hall.
I
Miss,Nellie Clark, of Prospect street, gave a card party
last evening.
~auseri~.
My DEAR TOPlcs:-With one exception the local
managers have been sadly neglectful of their New Year's
obligation to turn' o\'er a new leaf; and theatre goers
have been compelled, in consequence, to scan familiar
pages this week.
That exalllple was furnished by Manager Hilton, of
the Columbia Theatre, who presented the new Yankee
play of "Reuben Glue," with Mr. Johnnie Prindle in
the leading part.
Just why it should be called a "Yankee" drama I am
somewhat at a loss to understand; for, though Reuben
Clue is a conventional Down-Easterner, the action of the
play passes in Enghnt! and Australia and its atmosphere
is as far removed socially, as it is geographically, from
anything American. No one, I believe, considers
"Othello" a Moorish tragedy.
The bill of the play credits the late Fred Marsden
with dramatizing" Reuben Glue" from two of Thomes'
familiar stories of Australian bush ranging life; but he
cannot look back from the other world with any satis­faction
on his work, for it is slipshod and halting to a
degree. From what I remember of its foundation stories
and from the general drift of the plot, I should judge
that, in its lirst form, Dick Sommers was the hero of the
play, and that the character of Reubm was built up to
its present proportions for starring purposes only.
It is unnecessary, though, to enter into any minute
analysis of the purpose or character of the play. It is
simply a drama of sensationalism with no complemen­tary
merits to commend it.
The American stage furnishes at the present time two
representations of Yankee life. One, the Josh Wllit­comII,
of Denman Thompson, full of all the tenderness,
the manliness, the simple poesy of country life; the
other the gross caricature Alvin Joslyn, by Charles L.
Davis.
1\1 r. Pri nd Ie's R,'lIhcu Cille hangs, Iike Mahomet's cof­fin,
l,etween these two. nut it is much nearer the earth
of Mr. Davis than the heaven of Denman Thomson. It
has none of the ideality of dear old Une!cJosll, but it
also has none of the offensiveness'of Alvin Jo,'/yu. In
the old stock days it would have been considered a part
easily wi thin the grasp of the regular comedian, and I
can see no good anistic reason why we should be called
upon to accept it as a star performance now.
I t may achieve financial success, but none other
awaits it. The Alaska diamond sparkles, but it has no
substantial value.
This week, unconsciously or otherwise, the insatiable
II. R. Jacobs changes from amusement purveyor to pub·
lic moralist, and to the people who are making their vir..
tnous resolutions for the coming year, he points out tRe
rich rewards of moral living ant! the terrible" Wages of
Sin."
The fact that his warning takes a dramatic, rather
than a polemical form, only adds to its effectiveness.
To the great majority of mankind experience is the
only sufficient teacher; and the stage, in its duplication
of life, furnishes a vicariol's experience from which one
can extract the profit without undergoing the attendant
discomfort or sorrowing.
Aside from preachinJ this valuable and timely moral
lesson, "The Wages of Sin" possesses no special signi­ficance.
It is a tawdry and turgid melodrama. In one
s.:ene, that of the struggle in the cellar, it is even made
repulsive by the too great realism given to it by the
actors, and this should be largely modified in the inter­est
of good taste.
The company is about the same as the one that played
this drama at the Cleveland, last season. It gives a
smooth performance which does not now demand indI­vidual
recognition.
Some writer on theatrical matters-I cannot at this
moment recall who it was-lays do\~n this elemental
truth that the grandest triumph on the stage is that won
by the least exertion.
The attention of Nellie McHenry is carefully directed
to this dramatic canon in the hope that she may study
and follow it.
She isan actress who would be more artistic, and, there­fore,
more acceptable, if she were less energetic or had
the skill to mask her efforts with the illusion of sponta.
niety. From the time she first comes upon the stage until
the final curtain hides her from view, she does not know
idle moment. She is in a con stant f1\ltter of excite­ment
and is not content to let the current of her fun gush
TOW"N TOPIC:S~
out of its own free will but must pump it out with labor­ious
strokes.
All this is, in a measure, gratifying to an audience, for
it shows a sincere desire 01\ her part to give continuous
pleasure; but it reflects on the spontanie'.y of her art.
She has been seen this week at the Park Theatre in a
line of familiar parts which she played in her familiar
style. I wish (or her sake, as well as that of her patrons,
that she was more versatile. She uses the same symbols
of expression in everything; and has introduced in the
entire series of Salsbury productions, from "Patchwork"
down, her burlesque operatic selection. Candidly it is
growing a little tiresome.
The audiences, however, seem to accept her with
their old·time fervor and that should satisfy her.
Miss Dickie Martinez, a pretty girl with a pleasing
voice who was here last season with Alice Harrison, is
now with this company. Mr. Blair is still the principal
comedian and gives his usual specialties. He needs a
beller topical song, though. Mr. John Webster i~ a
very bad actor.
The successful play is constructed upon hydrostatic
principles. Interest, like water, always rises to its own
level. If the interest is universal so is the popularity of
the play.
This accounts for the vogue of "The Count of Monte
Cristo." It is a dramatization of a dream which has come
to everyone.
It is perfectly safe to say that there is not a person on
earth from prince to pauper but has, at some time glow­ing
visions of unbounded wealth, of unlimited power. It
is to come suddenly; it is to last forever. By it friends
are to be rewarded, enemies punished, desires sated and
ambitions gratified.
It is because we recognize in fifonte Cristo a kindred
soul whose hopes have reached fruition that we every­where
hold out to him, the hand of comradeship.
It is just the one touch of nature which makes the
whole world kin.
Mr.James O'Neill embodies the character with Sl)CCess.
In his hands it is natural without losing any of its buoy­ancy
and it is picturesque without being merely pictorial.
Yet, as all theatre·goers are familiar with its merits, there
exists no necessity for enumerating them.
He is supported by a company of medium calibre of
which Mr. f,hannon is the best, though Mr. Carroll Flem­ing
was manly and natural in a small part. Miss Grace
Raven, the Mercedes, was better in the fourth act than in
an y of the preceding ones.
SAGE.
MUSICAL MELANGE.
Although the composer mentioned in the clipping be­low
from Music and Drama, of New York, is credited
with having obtained part, at lean, of his musical educa.
tion in this city, none of the local teachers seem to be
able to recall him. If he did study here he did not man­ifest
enough talent to forcibly impress himself on their
memories.
"The new American opera' Yeti va,' will be presented
at the Tivoli Opera House, San F~ancisco, under the
mauagement of Kreiling Bros., in January. The scene
of the opera is laid in the historic old town of Albu­querque,
New Mexico, and the scenery, which is now
being prepared in San Francisco, will depict beautiful
and historic spots in/and about that famous town.
The musical portion of the work is by Lon Arnold, a
musician of great ability who has composed largely for
the piano and furnished music for many successful songs.
He is a graduate of conservato'ries in Cincinnati and
Cleveland, Ohio, and has also studied in other cities.
For the past two years he has been connected with the
music pubhshing house of F. A. North & Co., of Phila­delphia,
where his abilities as a composer were rapidly
developed. The libretto is supplied by Mr. George
Morgan. His portion of the work sparkles with whole­some
Wit and satire.
"The management of the Tivoli gave the work a hear­ing
and accepted it before the conclusion of the first act,
so pleased were they with the score, which was orches·
trated by Mr. Chas. F. Wenig, musical director of Palmer's
Theatre, New York. The opera will be given by a
strong cast especially engaged, a chorus of fifty and an
orchestra of twenty·five pieces. The costumes will be
entirely new and original, and are now being made in
New York.
I The liberal attendance at the presentation of "The
Messiah" at Music Hall, on last Monday, gave abundant
assurance that the public sentiment was thoroughly in
accord with the Vocal Society in its annual holiday pro-duction
of this grand oratorio. The society has given it
so many times in the immediate P'J.st that there is no
present need for extended comment. The chorus was not
as large as at previous festivals and the basses, as usual,
did the best portion of the cho.ral work. The sopranos
were weak in volume and decidedly overbalanced. Still,
taking all things into consideration, the singing of the
chorus was very creditable. Whitney was somewhat
hoarse but sang with his accustomed success. He was
at his best in "The people that walked in darkness," for
which the sombre quality of his voice was admirably
fitted. Miss Clapper proved as enjoyable at a second
hearing as a first. She is not a 'great contralto but her
voice is pleasant and her method fully in accord with the
best traditions of oratorio singing. Mrs. Ford's style 'is
growing in breadth and her singing suffered in no way
by the comparison with the imported talent. Mr. Jen.
kin's singing- of the tenor solos is well known. .
Mr. John E. Brand, of this city," who was a member of
the unlucky American Opera Company, is suing Mr.
Parke Goodwin, one 01 the directors, for $1,823.9°. In
a previous suit he obtained judgement (or this amount
against the Opera Company, but there was nothing to
satisfy it, so he is seeking to recover the money from the
individual members of the company. The suit is for
breach of contract. Mr. nrand is now singing at the
New York Casino.
The next meeting of the Ohio Music Teachers Associa­tion
will be held in this city in June, and the local com­mittee
is already making preparations for it. A number
of prominent musicians have been engaged and corres­pondence
is now being carried on with many others. It
will undoubtedly be a brilliant affair.
Mr. Arthur Foote, the rising young Boston composer,
is a great admirer of the playing of Mr. Charles Heydler,
of this city. He has just written him a Romanza for the
'cello and Mr. Heydler will play it for the first time in
-public at the Conservatory concert on January 17th.
Miss Neally Stevens, the Chicago pianist, will give a
number oP concerts at Akr.on, Canton and other neigh­boring
towns during this month. She has engaged Wil·
son G. Smith and Ollo Engwersen, the tenor, to assist
her.
The faculty of the Conservatory of Music will give a
concert at Plymouth Chapel on the 17th of this month.
Mr. Fred Sholes will be the vocal soloist.
A SYNDICATE IN SUITS.
Here is an item which may interest Cleveland young
men who desire to dress well, and yet lack the neces­sary
lucre, or the equally necessary credit:
A lot of young clerks in London have formed a singular
syndicate to dress well at small expense. Each member
pays a nominal entrance fee and small annual subscrip­tion.
A fashionable tailor supplies various suits of
clothes on the credit of the association. A meeting is
held and groups of members about the same height and
build bid for first, second or third .:hoice. .
The highest bidder ha. the right to wear the new suit
for three months, when he passes it on to the next high­est
bidder, who wears it for six months, after which it
goes to the lowest bidder, who is entitled to strut about
in the syndicate garments as long as they will last him.
If he chooses to return them to the association after
wearing them a few months a small sum is placed to his
credit, and' the suits are disposed of by contract at five
shillings each. The club more than pays expenses.
FANNY DAVENPORTS AUTOGRAPH.
Fanny Davenport, like all other celebrated people.has
been the enduring victim of the autograph fiend. She
made a test of the sincerity of one of these hunters in
Boston the other day. A lady wrote her an appeali~g
note, stationg that she would consider Miss Davenport's"
autograph invaluable. "Well, we'll see if she does,-'
said the actress, and taking out a carte de visite she wrqte'
across the face of it:
...................................................:
PASS Two.
FANNY DAVENPORT.
"Now, there is my autograph," said she, "and ~ will
_see if this party considers it of sufficient value to keep it
or use it to get into the theatre." It is hardly ne_c-.ssary
to state that the pass was used.
8
Clevelanders cio not seem to be aware that there is
being exhibited in our city one of the greatest paintings
of this century. and that means one of the greatest paint­ings
any age has produced. For, wonderful, great and
lasting as are the old masters, while admiring them and
learning from them, our nineteenth century masters have
fa~ surpassed them. Munkacsy's" Christ on Calvary"
is a fine example of the very height reached by our
greatest modern painters. It is great in every sense,
every part is artistic perfection, forming a composition
wonderful in its conception, overwhelming in intensity
of feeling, while showing great academic knowledge in
every detail. There are elements in this picture which
should appeal to every class. All studen ts should see it
often while this rare opportunity lasts, all artists, all
educators and believers in the refining influence of art
should be frequent visitors; while the feeliug, the senti­ment
of the picture, depicting, as it does, the supreme
moment in the life of the Supreme Being of the Christian
faith, should draw crowds of the religious devotees in
this city of churches.
A letter signed by the teachers and students of the
School of Art (formerly School of Design) has been
handed to Mrs. Harriet J. Kester, petitioning her to
withdraw her resignation and remain at her post as prin­cipal
of the school. She is the right woman in the right
place and it is to be hoped the trustees will be awake to
the best interests of the school, and by lightening Mrs.
Kester's '\lork and giving her sufficient assistance will be
able to retain her at the head of the institution. The
school has prospered in the face of many difficulties un­der
her efficient management. Many of the students
have been helped by her advice and influence. She has
quickly understood the needs of each and given encour­agement
and aid accordingly ~nd with delicate sympathy.
While the School of Art is open to both sexes the pre­dominating
numher of students will be women, and for
many reasons a woman should have charge of the school.
Mrs. Kester has proved herself admirably able to fulfill
the requirements of the position, and every inducement
necessary should be given her to remain.
The Verestchagen collection of paintings passes over
Cleveland and goes on to Chicago to be kept there on
exhibition at the Art Institute until April. The few for
Ie ones in our city who can visit Chicago will be
:ed with a view of these great exponents of modern
ghts and advanced ideas of art, but to the thousands
most stay here their great lessons of truth and real
1ust be 'ost because Cleveland, the would-be intel­tal
city, the Athens of the west, with its millionaire
ms of learning, is still without any building, hall,
I or skeleton whatsover that could be used as an
bition place.
Ie Art Club is widening its influence by opening day
es. This is a move in the right direction. Every.
: done to increase facility for study wiII be welcomed
very friend of progress and culture. But the man­lent
of the club would do well to recognize existiug
DIs. There is no one person and no set or class who
.d not wish all possible prosperity to the Art Club,
t were better so to divide honors as to have each rep­ltative
school maintain its own exhibit and be judged
ls own merits.
Ie Art Students' League will be received by Mrs. H.
:laflen, at the Hollenden, next Tuesday evening,
1 a Verestchagen evening will be enjoyed by the
bers of the League and their friends. The papers
ichel Angelo and La Vinci will be substituted by lec­I
written by the great Russian, and Mr. Gottwald
'supplement the readings by a talk about Mr. V.'s
:ings and his ideas.
;. F. C. Gottwald has returned from his Eastern trip
pughly embued with the great Verestchagen's ideas.
lad interviews with him in New York and in Boston,
his magnificent paintings, read his books and is
felled to call him a giant among the intellectually
'i men of the a~e.
I
I. F. W. Simmons has on exhibition his portrait of
!Houk, already mentioned in these columns, and two
~shed studies or well-known people, which again
TOW'N TOPICS.
demonstrate Mr. Simmons' great ability in portraiture
and thorough study.
Mr. James Grant, the genial gentleman in charge of
Munkacsy's great painting, after sending invitations to
the artists of the city kindly remembered the students of
the School of Art by sending complimentary tickets to
all of them.
LucIUs.
A PRIZE DINNER.
The lady readers or TOWN TOPIcs will undoubtedly be
interested i~ the following bill of fare, which was selected
from a great mass of other menus published in the New
York Pyas, and awarded a prize of $100 as the best din­ner
for four persons at a cost of $1.00:
Uysters on Half Shell.
Tomato Soup.
Breaded Lamb Chops (five or six.)
Mashed Potatoes.
Lettuce Salad. French Dressing.
Charlotte Russe.
Coffee.
COST.
Twenty-four oysters, 24 cents; soup, 9 cents; chops,
32 cents; potatoes, 6 cents; salad, 8 cents; charlotte
russe, 16 cents, coffee, 5 cents.
TOMATO Soul'.-Let one half can tomatoes and one
half pint of water come to a boil. Rub one heaping
tablespoonful of flour and one of butter with a little to­mato.
Stir into the boiling mixture, season with one
half teaspoonful of salt and one half teaspoonful of sugar.
Boil ten minutes_ Rub through a sieve and serve with
toasted bread. (Cut the bread in thin squares, butter
and place in a hot oven.)
CHol's.-Dip in one beaten egg and fine crumbs, sea­soned.
FREl'CH DRESSING.-Mix one saltspoonful of salt and
one half saltspoonful pepper in a cup. Add one table­spoonful
of oil. When thoroughly mixed add one table­spoonful
of vinegar and two more tablespoonfuls of oil.
CHARLOTTE RUSSE.-Made with pieces of stale sponge
cakes and flavored wipped cream, piled in the centre;
or they can be bought for four cents apiece.
NOTES.-l'o make mashed potatoes look as well as taste
deliciously, buy a potato masher that is full of fine holes,
through which the potato or any vegetable is easily
pressed, and it looks like vermicelli.
Filtered coffee is much better than boiled coffee.
THE GERMAN SCHOOLBOY.
The German schoolboy is not much of a boy according
to American ideas. He is a very sedate and polite little
chap. He has a big bump of respect for his elders. A
superficial observer might easily mistake him for Mark
Twain's good little boy. He gets up very early in the
morning to trudge off to school. as straight as his small
bow legs will carry him. His face and hands are clean.
His tow hair is combed well back from his shiny red
forehead. His trousers may be never so carefully patched,
they are never ra~ged.
He carries his books in a knapsack on his back. This
knapsack is a great thing, the German small boy thinks,
because the German soldiers carry knapsacks, too. His
favorite amusement is to get a iot of little white-haired,
shiny-faced comrades, with knapsacks on their backs, in
military line. He marches them up and down before
the school house during the recesses, drilling them in
the goose-step or teaching them how to salute, present,
and wheel.
This military drill is as dear to the small German heart
as is scrub, one-old-cat or marbles to the small American
heart. Indian clubs, base and football would be too
rough for the German school boy. He would be afraid
of getting kicked in the shins or of being tumbled over
in the dirt. He never gets tired, however, of trying to
turn his small pigeon toes out as he marches his company
along the street after school. He knows all about the
w(lrris of command and abuse which the officers use in
drilling the soldiers, because he has watched the drills at
the barracks every holiday. Indeed, the height of his
schoolboy ambition is to get a tiny helmet, bearing the
arms of the fatherland and a red and blue uniform. He
longs to be a soldier, just as an east side New York boy
longs to become a cowboy.
The German schoolboy is not much of a fighter. He
slaps and scratches his comrades occasionally, but he
never punches them. Like his rather, he can cut all
sorts of capers with his toy sword, but he does'n't know
how to balI his fists. When another boy slaps him he
becomes very dignified. He doesn't say" you're another,"
or " I'll get my big brother to fix you, Fritzie Oppen­heimer."
He lisps out a big double-jointed German
sentence of disapproval, and goes away to cry.
The German schoolboy has much better manners for
his years than the German ~tudent. When only 8 or 9
years old he says, .. excuse me,"" if you please," and
"thank you" fifty times where the American boy would
say them once. He tips his hat to everyone who speaks
with him on the street. He will try patiently (or five
minutes to tell a touri.t where the castle or library is,
and doesn't laugh when the tourist calls the library
" he " instead of " she" or the castle" she" insteal.l of
"' it. If
In the schoolroom the German boy is not the young
scapegrace that Tenier has painted him. He doesn't
know anything about chewing and throwing paper wads.
He doesn't kick the boy who sits before him, and he
doesn't pull the hair of his neighbor. He doesn't even
understand the utility of a crooked pin. His teacher
always maintains such a careful watch over his move­ments
that he has no time for these side issues. He
therefore learns a vast deal more in the same length of
time than the American boy.
A little chap of 12 or 13 years generally knows all
about that bad man, Napoleon. He can tel~ just how
Napoleon bent the good Prussian King at Jena and then
insulted the beautiful Queen Louise at Berlin. He knows
just how many thousands of the allied troops put down
Napoleon at Leipsic. If he is a Leipsic schoolboy he
will point out reverently the room in the old Rathhaus
where the wicked Napoleon lived while in Leipsic.
Then the German schoolboy can tell a tremendous deal
of anecdote biography, and fable concerning Martin
Luther, Frederick the Great, tbe Great Kurflirst, and
other German heroes. In fact, it is the small German
boy's education in the history of his native land tbat
makes him a hot little patriot at 13 year., and the prov­erbially
loyal solidier in after years.
A WOMAN'S WOES.
There isn't a man in the world hut thinks a woman
has an easy time, and there isn't one, if he had to ~o
through the fuss and bother of being one, who wouldn't
be in an iRsane asylum in less than a year.
In the first place, you must look well. A man can be
as ugly as home-made sin and still be popular. Whis­kers
cover up most of his face, and even though he has
a mouth big enough to take in a whole mince pie at a
single bite, nobody suspects it. If he has wrinkles, no·
body thinks he is getting old, but talk about the lines of
care on his forehead. Lines of care! humph! in nine
cases out of ten those lines were caused by his scolding
his wife when dinner was two minutes late, or when one
of those masculine buttons popped ofT, and, oh, my, what
a' hullabaloo he sets up then. But nobody says anything
about lines of care on her forehead! Oh, no! And a
ma.n's nose might put a blood-red beet to shame; but
nobody suspects he drinks. Oh, no!
A woman must always be just so, must look charming
and sweet, no matter how sour she feels; she must sing
and play on the piano and say something nice to every­body.
Her dress must hang and fit just so, have the
latest pucker, even if it was made in old Noah's time.
Some must wear a NO.3 shoe on a NO.5 foot and look
well dressed on 75 cents a week. She can't go out alone
at night, as woman must be protected; she can't be a
Free Mason, as she'd tell all about the goat and the
greased pig; she can't whistle, climb fences, stone cats
or say what she feels when she gets mad. She can't go
a-courting, but must manage some way to get married
before she is 25, or everybody will feel terribly hurt over
it and sigh and wonder why she" don't take," and all
the old maids and widows in the neighborhood will smile
and nudge each other.
When she feels bad nobody tucks a shawl over her on
the couch, or coddles her as a man has to be coddled
under such circumstances. Nobody closes the door any
softer when her head is splitting with a headache.
Now, ir there is a man living who thinks a ,woman has
an easy time, just let him have his hair pulled to the top
of his head and a pound more pinned on that, get into a
pair or corsets, tie half a dozen TOWN TOPICS Rround his
waist, get into a dress that he can't more than breathe
in and can't put his hands to his head without popping
open a sleeve, and be a woman himself awhile and see
how he likes it himself.
All thinis come around to him who waits, including p
bald head, false teeth, and ear-trnmpets, and heaps .~
miscellaneous troubles.
BY GEORGES OHNET, AUTHOR OF "LE MAITRE DE
FORGES."
N---, MARCil, 1886.
To M. LOUIS GA:-iDERAX, PARls-D~ar a1td Ho1toud
Sir:-You would hardly believe how much pleasure your
letter of a few weeks ago-on the organization of a con­servatory
at the capitol of the king, my master-has given
me, pleasure followed, alas' by great trouble of mind.
So .far away from Paris-where I had lived for several
years, as secretary of the embassy-your letter was like a
charming echo of the noises of the great city. I had, in
a flash, the vision of the theatre glittering with lights,
filled with celebrated men, adorned with smiling women,
as it was when I attended the debut of Mlle. Rejane. A
sound of music buzzed in my ears, applause followed with
a roll like thunder, and, in spite of myself, I shut my eyes,
sayinl:' to myself: "I am there still j I have only to
stretch out my hand to touch the orchestra rail, only te
lift my eyelids to have appear before me in its radiant
frame the whole captivating, prodigious, and unique pic­ture
of Parisiau life." I could not resist the temptation.
I looked, but the fleeting mirage vanished, and with a
sigh I stood with your letter in my hand and regret in my
heart.
During the council, in the afternoon, I was absent­minded.
His majesty, who presided, looked at me with
surprise, then with dissatisfaction, and hrially rose, say­ing:
"I have a slight headache; I am going to get some
fresh air on the terrace. Gentlemen, continue your la­bors
j I trust in your penetrating intellects. Baron, fol­low
Ine."
Hardly were we out of the hall when the king stopped,
and with the at once kindly and ironical accent habitual
with him when he speaks to me familiarly: "It seems
that the Eastern question does not interest you to-day?
You are far enough away from the Servians and Bul!:,ar­ians.
"
"It is true, sire, I humbly confess."
"And what can disturb the ideas of an aulic councilor
to such an extent?"
.. Only a letter, with the Paris post-mark."
At these words his majesty blushed-remember my
gracious master is only twenty-live-and with a sigh such
as I had breathed in the morning, I, whose head is gray:
"Aht Paris !,t)
He flicked the rroers of his uniform with a nervous fin­ger,
and, sighing for the second time:
"Do you remember, baron, Our two journeys? Oh,
happy time! Lovely days, unrestrained and free from
care! I was only crown prince then; I went incognito,
and you were my only mentor. It was May; under the
early sun the leaves were budding on the branches, the air
was soft, the very dust was vanilla-scented, and we walked
on air, in a sort of intoxication, thinking the women
prettier and life more smiling."
He paused, as we say in novels, and with a careless
air:
"And what does your letter say? "
"Sire, it relates to one of the interesting creations'
planned by your majesty-that of a conservatory."
"Oh, yes! It will be a useful institution, I think; but
on condition that we are not too exclusive. -We won't
lay down too many rules for talent for fear of stifling it.
In Paris among the artists who fix the public attention
the school has only sent out little prodigies. There are
actors and actresscs the span taneous prod ucts of inde­pendent
culture--a species of wild plant shooting up in
the midst of the garden bed-that have a more vivid
splendor, a more penetrating fragrance, and claim the
admiration of the multitude more irresistibly. We have
had proof of that. Do you remember, baron 7"
The king's speech became swwer; he moved his head,
and murmured; "Ah, Pari's! "
Then, leaning his elbow on the balustrade of the ter­race,
he was silent, letting his dreamy eyes wander over
the horizon. Before him lay spread ollt the city, with its
striped houses, its monuments with their Byzantine cupo­las,
its belfries shaped like minarets, for with us the Ori­ental
begins, and you feel that our town has been possessed
in turn by Christian and Mussulman. In the background,
the Danube was H.wing tumultuously among its black.
wooded islands, and under the melancholy gray winter
sky flights of herons passed. ~oing toward the sun. The
king was in a reverie, and within myself, as if an invisi­ble
chain had bound my imagination to his, I followed
his reverie, and sawall his thoughts unravel.
You will certainly wonder, dear and honored sir, what
connection this profound meditation of the king, my
_TOWN TOPICS.
master-overlooking the Danube which people are pleased
to call blue but which is yellow-can have with the ques­tion
of the conservatory about which I had the happy
idea of consultin: you. A very intimate connection, as
you will acknowledge in a moment. And that it may ap­pear
mllre clear to you, I ask your permission to relate
the two journeys to which his gracious majesty designed
to allude. Perhaps the .paths that I am following seem
to you a little devious; but a man can not with impunity
pass twenty years of his life in embassies, and you are not
unaware that to diplomatists the longest road is always
the best.
So it was five years ago. The king-whom we had
the sorrow of losing last year-seeing his son in posses­sion
of all his university degrees, a master of tactics-his
tutor, the field-marshal, having taught him, on paper, all
the secrets of compact and dispersed order-well-built,
fair-haired, and ruddy-cheeked, feared the effect on his
heir of idleness in a court where his will would be a law
accepted by all men and his fancy an order longed for by
all women. He resolved to send him on his travels, and
attached me te his person. \Ve set out with large credit
on several European ban kers, and our first stopping-place
was Paris. Hardly had we reached the hotel-the prince,
for the sake of more freedom, would not alight at the em­bassy-
when his highness asked for the newspaper, and
examined the programme of the theatres. The theatres'
Ah' the Parisians, blase with their good fortune, have no
idea of the magic attraction exercised on strangers by
those two words. The theatre is the most resume of Pari­sian
life j 011 the boards, Paris itself, incarnate in drama
or comedy, weeps with contagious heart-sickness or laughs
with unquenchable gayety.
" Olfenbach ! " cried the prince; "here's for us! Let
us go to see' Belle.Lurette.'"
I confess, dear and honored sir, that I have mostly for­gotten
the piece, but what has remained distinct in my
mind is the intense impression made on his highness by
the appearance of the artist who played the principal
part. Whether she sang or spoke, the prince listened in
a sort of ecstasy. Everything had disappeared, libretto,
music, actors, actresses j nothing existed but the delicious
woman, who shone in the full flower of her twenty years.
As soon as the cllrtain went down, his highness, with•
out any explanation, as if no other could be meant, said:
" Baron, what is her name?"
I answered" Jane Hadillg, monseigneur."
" How do you know? "
"I looked at the bill, coming in."
The prince smiled approvingly.
"Jane Hading," he went on; "she is English, then.
Strange that she has no accent. Bewitching creature'"
His highness appeared to hesitate; then, taking his
stand:
" Who i, she? Go and find out, my dear friend."
I was his dear friend! I went out into a corridor, and,
spying out a box· opener with a worthy and obliging face
-some distant cousin of the Mme. Cardinal of your witty
countryman, M. Ludovic Halevy-I set to work with
diplomatic reserve to draw from her the information ex­pected
by my prince. But so much astuteness was not
necessary, or perhaps, my bearing inspired confidence,
r...r I h __· scarcely said a few words when the good lady
expanded with details.
"What' is she English 7 Np.ver in the world! French.
Almost French and a half, for she is from Marseilles!
Her family name is Hadingue-they cut off the end; it's
prettier; it sounds fine. Child of the theatre, my dear
sir, like all the great artists. She played in comedy at
three years old. Her father was not an actor, adored in
the south j you might call him the Melingue of Lyons
and Marseilles. When he played Lagardere, instead of
in the tableau holding a doll in his arms, he took his
daughter. Fancy the dear little darling nestled against
her father's shoulder, a little bit sleepy, for it was her
bed-time, and hearing, broken by the shock of rapiers, the
vibrating replies: 'ut me but touch thy sword. I md no
mor~ to reac!l tlly bYlast.' ;;> • *' • 'AI., have a care, M. d~
Nro~rs, you will wound your child.' The theatre enters
your heart by your ears like that. my dear sir. So the little
Jane dreamed of it, and nobody could think of preventing
her from being an artist. Lord, then there was double
work! She made her costumes herself while s/le was
studying her parts. She began by playing comedy and
drama-' The Orphans' and ever so many others-hut it
was not lucrative enough; she h::.d to change her style.
It is only the stars of song who are well paid, so forward
music! The idea of going into operetta turned her sick,
but there was her family behind her. with father wearinc
out his life running about the provinces. and mother tak.
ing care of the little brothers at. home. She resign ed her­self
and was rewarded for it, for she made a great many
9
successes before she came to us. At Cairo, at Algiers, at
Marseilles, she was the rage. But Paris drew her, and
one fine day she arrived here. She played for a year at
the Palais Royal, then she went to the Renaissance. She
created the J olie Persane, and now she is singing the
Belle Lurette. I want you to notice her costume of Har­lequine.
It was designed by a great painter of Paris,
who is a woman. But you know, my good man. I had
better warn you that young girl is like Mont-Valerien­it
spouts fire and is impregnable."
I gave the woman a louis; she smiled and shrugged
her .houlders, and I thought I heard her murmur hetween
her teeth: "The old ras~al!" but I attached no import.
ance to it, and wen t back to the box to tell all to his
highness.
As I finished, the curtain rose. The prince was buried
in contemplation, and I myself took a peculiar interest in
following the play of the beautiful actress. It seemed to
me that the fanciful verve that she Jisplayed showed a
slight effort, as if her nature did not bend itself to the
frank expression of the sentiments that her role obliged
her to translate. The Italian proverb came to my mind:
Traduttore, traditor~,. "Translator, traitor." And I
thought that through too much native refinement she
slightly betrayed a work full of the license of high spirits.
However, she did well everything that she COUld, singing,
smiling with her lovely lips and her soft eyes. But, in
spite of all, a little melancholy could be suspected under
all her wild ways. The prince thought everything admir­able,
and, flushed and animated, had not eyes enough for
the bewitching Harlequine.
At the close of the second act he turned abruptly, and,
in a voice that I did not recognize as his, said:
" Baron, I must in person express my admiration to
that exquisite actress."
I shrugged my shoulders. "\'Vhy, monseigneur, you
would have to go behind the scenes."
"Let us go."
"They would not let you in."
"I shall gi ve my name."
"Gracious heavens' Your highness will compromise
yourself. All the papers will be full of the story to-mor­row.
What will the king, your father, say 7"
"Baron, my father is in his capitol, and I am here. To
the devil with restraint; If you succeed in having me
meet that adorable creature, you shall have the order of
the Niebelungen."
That order was my dream. Count Stecki had obtained
it by intriguing, and it was not mine yet.
"Well, monseigneur," I said, weakening, "let us go
and wait at the stage door after the play."
You know, dear and honored sir, whal that exit is into
the horrible Rue de Bondy. It was raining. We stood
on our feet against a wall covered with tattered bills, four
steps from a muddy, evil-smelling corner, where the water
dripped from the roofs-frozen, mud-splashed, but patient.
The pnnce, who did not feel in place, clenched his teeth
and buried his blonde mustache in the collar of his over­coat.
I have seen him since under the fire of -a Turkish
battery; he wore just the same expression. From time to
time, men carne out, bent, sad, thin, and I guessed them
to be the actors who had made me laugh so. Women
went by in miserable waterproofs, opening umbrellas with
broken ribs, and I recognized the chorus girls, an hour
before dressed in satin and velvet. We waited still. Our
society had been augmented by a hackney carriage,
whose yellow lanterns hardly showed through their drip­ping
&:Iass. Suddenly a distinct and rapid step was heard
in the dark passage. A slender form passed in front of
the concierge's box. and, simply dressed, followed by a
lady in black, appeared she for whom we were wailini.
"Why, it's raining'" she said in her clear voice; "quick.
madman !"
She came on. The prince, without a word, opened the
carriage door, and, with uncovered head, helped in the
two women. The actress looked at him with her candid
eyes, smiled a little surprisedly, and said: "Thank you.
monsieur."
The carria:e departed. Silently the prince took me by
the arm, and, without heerling the falling rain, we came
back the whole length of the boulevards. On reachiD~
the hotel his highness broke silence, and said to me:
" She is a young girl, baron."
Whence I concluded that ever since he had not ce~
. thinking of the beautiful singer, and that he was ~or.
moved than he cared to show.
Our stay in Paris after this incident was shortened.
The prince set out for En~land. But he was bored there.
and we returned home much sooner than the king could
have wished. His highness never made an allusion to
our evening; he seemed to have forgotten it, he did not
even give me the order that I had, nevertheless. earned,
10
I only got it tWI) years later, on the occasion of his mar­riage.
As you Itnow, dear and honored sir, his highness mar-ried
a princess of Saxe·Hohenlinden, of very great nobili ty,
of very great intellect, but of l'ery slender beauty-more
moral than physical qualities. But as a political union it
was admirable. The prince took his wedding journey
through Europe, and did me the honor to take me with
"bim. As had been the case three years before, Paris was
our first stopping-place, only this time, as we were travel­ing
in an official capacity, we went to the embassy. On
arriving in the great city, the prince seemed agitated by
some strange fever; he talked with vivacity, he joked,
which both astonished and delighted the young princess.
Before dinner his highness said to me, mischieviously:
"Baron, we must go to the theatre this evening; but noth­ing
light, that won't do in these days-a serious play!
They have a new piece at the Gymnase. Send for a pros­cenium
box."
Three hours later we were installed, their highnesses
in the front of the box, I at the back, and the curtain was
rising. The work was called "Le Maitre de Forges." ]t
has had considerable success in France and abroad, which
proves ·that on the boards, as in the world, we are some­times
happier than we deserve. For I have seen se\'eral
plays that were worth more and that had not such bril­liant
good fortune. The first scene went on; the heroine
had just risen from an arm-chair in which she was lying
at the back of the stage. At this moment the prince
started and gave a stined exclamation. I was stupefied
like him. In the actress who pensively advanced toward
the footlights I had recognized the singer (:)f other days.
Only Claire de Beaulieu was as fair as Belle Lurette had
been dark. But there was no mist,\king her in spite 01
the metamorphosis. It was she with her delicious profile,
her proud eyes, her slender and suple figure, and a dreamy
something that gave her whole person an inexpressible
charm. His highness and I exchanged a look. The
princess was there, we dared not say anything, and I could
freely follow the delicate and pathetic play of the actress.
How much more she was in her right place on this stage!
How her talent developed here at ease, in her delicate
soberness and her passionate gravity. All that she did
was original and yet true; she gave the illusion of life
itself, and in her impersonation pulsed a real soul.
I read the prince's ardent curiosity in his face. Fortu­nately
the I'ri"ce d' Ascalon, whom we had had as attache
of the French legation, came to present his homage to
their highnesses.
"Who is that pretty actress?" asked the princess, as if
she had been prompted.
"Madame, she is almost a debutante, and you see how
she is pelted. She used to sing at the Renaissance. Her
name is Jane Hading."
"Is she English?" said the princess.
The coincidence was so odd that the prince and I could
not refrain from a smile.
"No madame, French, and a well acclimated Parisian.
Or, rather, say tht Parisienne herself, with her grace,
more beautiful than beauty. She has played this piece for
eight days and made a furore. The whole town is ill I"\'A
·with her. Ii it 1'0' c"ri~\' r
C 1f'1 q In' ,I ~
l' -j I, 0 l, _'-:.C~, <He approval of any pro-fessor.
But that is a tradition of the Gymnase, and this
lucky theatre has owned three of the most remarkable
actresses of the time-Rose Cheri, Desclee, and Jane
Hading-grown up on the stage like out-door plants
among hot-house growths by the favor alone of the good
Lord !"
"She is really incomparable," said the princess; "I
must send her a souvenir, with some flowers."
The prince m..de a gesture; I did not wait for him to
speak. I sprang into a carriage, \Vent to Bapst, the jew­eler
to the crown, selected a bracelet set with diamonds;
to Labrousse for the hands'omest bouquet I could find,
and, an hour later, I had return.ed, The princess gra­ciously
approved my choice, and condescended with her
own hand to write on a card; "From the princess royal,
with her sincerest compliments."
The prince read it, flushed with pleasure, and gave the
princess the sweetest look she had yet received from him.'
I am sure that he never loved her so well as during that
minute when they had been in such complete har.nony of
mind and heart. And I think I may safely affirm that she
Dever suspected to whom she owed that happy minute.
You see, dear and honored sir, that the story was
closely relaled to the affair that occupies us. It is from
that "heart-stroke," as we call it in our country, that the
TOWN TOPICS.
lively interest my master takes in theatrical matters came
to him.
It was in the recollections evoked by the magic word
" Paris," that the king was absorbed, leaning against the
marble balustrade. I understood so well the sweetness
of his feelings that I stood silent and motionless, fearing
to disturb him.
After a rather long time he"turned and said: "You
have not communicated to me the letter that agitated you
so strongly."
I handed it tQ him. He read it attentively; then, with
a smile:
" Your correspondent's advice will have happy results
if you follow them without too settled ideas. Try to
bring out Rejanes in our conservatory, but try everywhere
to discover Jane Hadings. Expect much from the zeal of
your professors; however, enter into account with nature,
who likes to form rare and precious models, by herself, as
if in sporl."
On this the king bowed with the nohle grace which he
inherits from his glorious father, and went toward his
apartments.
This, dear and honored sir, is the effect produced by
your intellectual correspondence. I confess that I am
much troubled and that I do not know exactly what direc­tion
to give to the dramatic studies of our conservatory.
It seemed to me difficult enough to bring up' a few
Rejanes. \....hat is to become of me now that the king,
my master, has commanded me to invent Jane Hadings?
They say that. some of the best players in your Theatre
Fran~aise are thinking of sulking at the Parisian public.
If they would consent to come and give us a few lessons
I do not think I am taking too much upon me in declar­ing
that we would make them a bridge of gold.
In any case, deign to accept, dear and honored sir, my
best thanks for the trouble yon have taken, and believe
me in all sincerity, your devoted servant, '
THE BARON X.,
Aulic councilor, chamberlain to his majesty,
director of the Royal Conservatory.
THE GERMAN BATTALION.
The whole work of the battalion, as distinguished from
that of the Companies composing it, is done by the Bat­talion
Commander and Adjutant. It is expressly laid
do\~n that" supernumerary Field Officers and Captains
are only to join the battalion when it is formed for the
parade or for the march past."
The battalion is formed of four companies. The bat­talion
commander gives either cautionary and executive
words of command, or only the former. He gives both
the cautionary and executive words when all the com­panies,
being in one of the fundamental formations, have
to act alike. In all other cases he gives only cautionary
orders.
Movements from one formation to another are usually
made with sloped arms. When the companies have
taken up their new positions they order arms, dress, and
""~ta~d easy, unless otherwise or-l rae
} .. e 0, l. (~1 ~ _
, lio:" ".\ f.o lone t t e
el;L I} _t. I " en ;.)" \.. 1',,/1/.
Ii n ' ...., JT d l\ It lention. e:l ".• c
1.1>e I. crellon .f the lJaH''''l <'"':"::....4 ..U"r. All subse-
_. .. , ...uvements of the. companies are made" at ease,"
except that when actually under the enemy's fire the
step must be taken up (i. ~., the men must move and
stand at attention.)
The battalion is always, when not deployed, formed
in company columns which may be arranged according
to the available space and the object in view.
All four companies are in company colums-i. ~., in
columns of platoons, at eeven paces distance. No. I
Company is on the right, with NO.2 in its rear. NO.3
is abreast of No. I, at three paces interval, with NO.4
in its rear. The column has thus a frout of two platoons,
plus three paces, and a depth of six platoons. The in­terval
of three paces between the front ranks of the lead­ing
platoons of Nos. I and 3 Companies is filled up by
the color bearer, with a sergeant on each side of him.
These sergeants are taken from the supernumerary ranks
of the two leading platoons. When the column is re­tiring
the interval between the then leading platoons is
filled up by three sergeants from the supernumerary
ranks of those platoons. Company Commanders ride
two and two, those of Nos. I and 2 Companies in the
rear of the right flank of the last platoons on the right,
those of Nos. 3 and 4 in the rear of the left of the last
platoon on the left. This is used for the assembly and
for movements out of fire.
Changes in the direction of the march may be made by
turning, by the diagonal march, by word of command,
or by the introduction of a new point to march on; by
wheeling up in ·sections (the Color-bearer and his escort
forming, when in Doub\e Column, an independent sec­tion),
and also by the wheel'of the columns themselves.
COMING ATIRACTIONS.
Tragedy will have an inning at the Opera House on the
first three nights of next week (with Wednesday matinee)
and Margaret Mather will be at the bat. She will ap­pear
in "Romio and Juliet," "Leah," "The Honeymoon"
and "Macbeth." Miss Mather is so well known here
that she now needs no advance heralding. She has a
recognized position as a tragedienll~ and counts Cleveland
as one of the strongholds of her admirers. Promise is
made that her company will be composed of the best
talent obtainable and that the reputation her perform.
ances gained under Mr. Hill for sumptuous costuming
and stage settings will not be departed from
All the rest of the week, which includes the Saturday
matinee, the wonderful Hermann, assisted by his pretty
wife will appear. He brings with him a budget of new
tricks almost as large as the pack of Santa Claus? and
the old ones he does gain a momentary freshness from
the skill he displays in them.
Manager Hilton, of the Columbia Theatre, has been
promising his patrons for some time a treat in the en­gagement
of the celebrated H. W. Williams' Specialty
Company. It will appear at his theatre next week. The
company is headed by the well-known Bobby Gaylor,
who has hosts of admirers in Cleveland, and all the other
members of the troupe come highly commended for their
excellence in the various branches of their profession.
The experience at this theatre-and at all the others, in
fact-has been that the public are more anxious to see
clean, well-diversified variety shows than any other form
of entertainment and the management shows good sense
in giving it to them.
"The Buckeye," the play in which Miss Lizzie Evans
wiII be seen at the Park Theatre next week, should be
particularly attractive in this city, for it was written by
J. C. Macy, a former Clevelander, and much of the ac­tion
of the play takes place in Cleveland or vicinity. It
is said to be an excellent piece of workmanship and Miss
Evans has found the part of the heroine one particularly
adapted to her talents. Indeed she is credited with
rising in it 10 a loftier pitch of dramatic excellence than
she had previously attained. As the play thus makes a
direct appeal to local pride and as, in addition, Miss
Evans is well-liked here, the engagement should turn out
a prohtable one.
Sunshine always follows after rain, and the dark clouds
of melo·drama that have hung over the Cleveland The­atre
for the past two or three will be dissipated next
Monday by the smiles of comedy. "The Kindergarten,"
a musical whimsicality, by Robert Griffin Morris, the
dramatic critic of the NellJ York Td~gram, will then be
IF. fr )owell and Miss Annie Hart, two
medians, in the principal parts.
Hoyt order and it has been a
for some years. It makes no
Cieri II}' " ,,[ strength, but simply amuses
, -==.;.."i Situation;, lively music, pretty dancing and
the thousand and one little conceits that go to make up
plays of this character.
The Dime Museum will place many curios on exhibi­tion
next week, but the chief bid for popular favor will
be made through the two stage shows, which will be of
an unusually entertaining quality. Among those who
will then appear will be Frank and Lottie Sinclair, the
sketch artists; Dick Hume, the eccentric comedian;
Bryant and Holmes in their original comedietta, " Squibs
the Poet;" Eflward E. Evans, fancy club swinger, and
the Gleason children.
HAD IT BAD.
A good story is told of a young lady who kissed a
baby held in its father's arms; then in a moment of
temporary insanity or abstraction she stood on tiptoe and
kissed the papa. Realizing instantly what a dreadful
thing she had done, she wheeled around and kissed the
baby's mamma, who was standing near, and retired in
good order. Her satirical sister squelched the poor
young woman, as they. left the house, by asking her if
she didn't want to go back and finish it by kissing the
hired girl.
A New York maD shot his wife because she wouldn't
take II bath. It takes II great provocal"ion to arouse a
New Yorker.
Tit" Fn7lf1rile and Pic.
fuY"sqlu' Nouleto
New York, Boston and
the East,
Valley Railway.
Depart. Ani"e.
Valley Junction Mail... "7:45 a. m. ~:30 p. m.
Marietta Express tII:15 a. m. t3:30 p. Ja. •.
Canal Dover Express 4:15 p. ffi 10:15 a. m..
Clev'd & Canton Ex t7'oo p. m. t8.15 a. m.
·'Daily.
tDaily except Sunday.
Depot-South Water Street.
Trains on all roads run nn Slalllbrd lime, which
IS 3:l11111Hlles slower than city time.
The Nickel Plate,
NEW YORK, CH ICAGO & ST. LOUIS RAIL­ROAV
co.
Following is corrected time to Nov. 25th, 1888.
All trains daily except Sunday.
ARRIVR.
Fostoria Accommodation 10:40 a. m.
Ashtabula I.ocal 1-00 p. m.
No. I, Huffalo Express...... . 5:11 p. m.
NO.4, Chicago Express 9:.oP. m.
DEPART.
NO.3·, Chicago Express 6:30 a. m,
Ashtabula Local 1:30 a. m.
No.2, Buffalo Express ,10:4° a. m. - V
Fostoria Accommodation 5:11 p. m.
Euclid Accommoda'n leaves 6:20 a. m. 5:05 p. m.
River Rank II 740 a. m. 140 p. m.
City Ticlet Office.: 222 Banle St., 598 Pearl
St., and Depots.
LEWIS WILLIAMS, Q. F. HORNER.
Gen'l Supt. Gen'l Pass. Ag't.
Cleveland, O.
The Shortc'_;l and Quick.
est Route to Pitts-­burgh,
\V'ashington
and Ihltimore, and
the Southeast.
New Cenlra Depot So. \Valer Sl. and Viaduct.
DRI'AI<T.
No. 62, Al:commo<.\;'taioll t6:ooa. m.
No. 72, New York & I-'ittsb'g Expre~s.. ';"8:30a. m.
No. 70, J\·lahoning div. & Pitts'h local. ..tll:4Sa. m.
No. 64, PHlsbllrgh Express........ . ':'3:00P. m.
No. 74, ShenangoValley Express t4:20P. m.
No. 66, Leavittsburg Accommo· '·'4:4oP. m.
No. 68, New York Express ¢lo:50P. m.
Fo. 1i8. Pittsburgh Exprcss tlo:So p. m.
AI~RIVE.
No. 61, Pillsburgh' Express....... .. t7:35 a. m.
No. 77, Accommodation 5:25 a. m.
No. 6s, Fast New York & Plttsb'g EX ':'<IO:5S a. m.
No. 67, Pittslllugh Express tIo:5Sa. m.
No. 63. New Vork & P"l5burgh Ex.. 6:55 p. m.
No. 69, Pittsburgh Local Express... *9:10 p. m.
ot:Dai1r. tDaily except Sunday.
Oleveland & Oanton Railroad.
Depart for-Canton and Coshocton 7:00 a. m., 3:15
p. m.
Bedford-7:oo a. 111.,11:10 a. m.• 1:30 p. m.• 3:15 p.
m., 4:40 p. m., ';'S:45 p. m., 10:35 p. m,
Newburgh-6:I23. m., 7:00 a. m., tl:IO a. m., 1:30
p. m., 3:15 p. m., 4:40 p. m., *5:45 p. m., 8:1,5;. ­Ill.,
10:30 p. m.
Kent-7:oo a. m., 3:15 p. rn'). *5:45 p. 01.
Arrive from-Canton and coshocton 9:55 a. m. 6:"0
p. m.
Bedford-6:oo a. m., *7:50 a.m., 9:55 a. m., 1:05 p.
In., 4:05 p. m., 6:40 p. m., *7:10 p. m.
Newburgh-6:oo a. m., 7:10 a. m., *7:50 a. m., 9:55
3. m., 1:05 p. m., 4:05 p. m., 6:40 p. m., 7:10 p. m.,
9:12 p, m.
Kent-*7:S0 3. m., 9:55 a. m., 6:40 p. m.
Theatre train leaves Cleveland 10:35 p. m, and
runs through to Bedford daily except Sunday for
N ewburl:' and Bedford .
Trains marked (l Daily.
Station Ontario street, opposite Huron.
1l
.. $2.00
... 1.00
.50
..... scts.
and Ljt~ratur~.
A Wukly Revi~w 01 Society, Art
One year ..
Six mOllths .
'l'hree months .
Single copies ..
A full line of elegant pocket-knives and
razors and a large variety ofscissors, made
of surgical instrument steel, now in stock
.. t E. M. Hessler's, No. 68 Public Square.
Try on~ and see the difference between a
really good article and a common one.
The attention of travelers to the West is
respectfully directed to the
PALACE HOTEL.
Pl1blifihers anu Proprietors TOWN TOPICS.
TI!RJ\lS (IN ,\OVA:-lCE):
ROSENBERG & ROSE.
AdvertiSing rates m:Hlc known on apIlllcatioll.
THE NEW PRESIDENT.
Cleveland, Ohio.
I n ordering by mail, remit hy exprc:-;s, moncy
oreler, post-olTlce order, rcgistered letter, check
or draft, payable to the order of
CLEVELAND. OHIO:
Lithograph Build'g, cor. SI. Clair & \Vooel st~.
Telephone, 8S2.
Entered at the Post·Office at Cleveland, 0., as
Second Class maller.
Gener:tl lIarrison had his life insured
last Saturclay, in Indianapolis, taking out
a policy for $10,000. I-Ie had contem­plated
doing so for some time, and that
evening, on his usual stroll down town,
ran across the agent of the Equitable Life
Assurance Company. Schidler is big and
good hearted, and the President-elect, as
they shook hands, remarked, that he was
ready to have his life insured. They
walked to the office of Mr. Schidler, Gen'l
Harrison presenting his certificate of a
physician, which pronounced him to be as
sound as a golden guinea. The papers
were then drawn up and policy ordered
made for the benefit of Mrs. Harrison.
This makes $50,000 life insurance carried
by Gen. Harrison, $5,000 of which is paid
up insurance. The Equitable Life Assur­ance
Company made the following remark­able
exhibit of its business for 1888: New
business for the year, $15°,000,000; total
cash receipts, $26,000,000; increase of
assets, $10,000,000, making total assets
over $90,000,000; surplus at 4 per cent.
valuation, $20,000,000; assurance in force,
$55°,000,000.
.. The youngest soldier of the late war"
is becoming so very young, that it is
pretty safe to say tltat he was a member
of the infant-ry.
rOPICS.
co.
TLYWN
&
&
Test you watches.
HULL
MISS BROOKS.
R.
l'iirHull's time IS accurate.
co.~~
You Know Why We Do It?
E. R. HULL
E.
bel';I\ISe we delight III throwing away ollr profit, and mort.: too that
we now give
Ladies, you c:tn save money, and at the same time obtain a perfect fit and a bettet"
made garment by getting your NEWMARKET of MISS BROOKS, who, this season,
is not only prepared to make, but to furnish them complete, at a price lower than the
ready-made garment can be bought. Call and see different style;;.
ROOMS, 27 AND .8 NOTTINGHAM BUILDING,
Opposite Euclid Avenue Opera House. R EucliJ Avenue. Eleyator.
Men's and Boys' Overcoats. Men's and Boy's Reefers
and Vests, Men's and Boys' Pants, and Men's
and Rays' Underwear and Cardigan Jackets.
But because these departments are overstocked and must be unloaded be­fore
the season is over. We appreciate the fact that many people put off
purchasing in the hope of buying cheaper at this season of the year, and
we also know that there is another great element that will speculate for
future wants when INDUCEMENTS ARE OFFERED. To both of
these classes we say, come right along. Now is your opportunity, and if
you have a friend who has purchased any of the garments named from us
this season, ascertain what he or she paid, and if you do not find that we
offer the identical thing for one-fifth less, we will forfeit One thousand dol­lars
each for every finger and toe in your body.
This great One-Fifth Off Sale is being conducted at ALL OUR
STORES, and will terminate at our option.
A full line of German and English authors. German illustrated and humorous maga.r:inel and pel'i­odicals
a specialty.
\-
Cleveland & Pittsburgh Railroad. '
Arrive. Depart.
New York Express 12 50 p. m. 7.5 a. m.
New York Express.. 6 55 P m. I 35 p. m.
Alliance Accommod·n 935 a. ffi. 325 p. m~
Ravenna Accommod'n... 8 2S a. m. 500 p. m.
Night Express 525 a. m. *11 10 p. Q). •
"'Daily; all other trains daily except Sundays.
Oleveland, Lorain & Wheeling R. R.
ARRIVE.
No.2, Daily. except Sunday Z:.o .
NO.4, Daily................................... :50 p. m.
DEPART. •• ~
No. I. Daily 6:45.~ ••: -;'t
NO,3, Dally, except Sunday 4:15~\." ./
"
Mount Vernon & Pan Handle Route
c. A. & C. Ry. co. Arrive. Depart.
Akron, Col. & Cin. "Flyer" 5:.0 p. m. 8:loa.lD.
Akron, Col. & Cin. NIght
Express........... 7:00:a. ffi. 8.00 p. m.
Akron ..Col. & Z'ville Ex 10:45 p. m. I:40P' m.
Aleron & Orrville Accom.. 9:35 a. m. 3:25 p. m.
The 8 r.' m. train runs daily. Elegant Pullmaa
palace seeping cars attached. All other trains
daily except Sunday.
C. H. Livingstone, Manager.
SAN FRANCISCO, CAL.
The Palace Hotel occupies an entire
block in the center of San Francisco. It
is the model hotel of the world. It is
Fire and Earthquake proof. It has Five
Elevators. Every room is large, light
and airy. The ventilation is perfect. A
bath ancl closet adjoin every room. All
rooms are easy of access from broad, light
corridors. The central court, illuminated
by the electric light, its immense glass
roof, its broad balconies, its carriage-way,
and its tropical plants, are features
hitherto unknown in American hotels.
Guests entertained on either theAmerican
or European plan. The restaurant is the
finest in the city.
'l-! . "'.'. -
FLIEGENDE lJLAiTTER,
DIE MODENWELT.
GARTENLA UlJE,
UElJER LAND UND MEER,
*-EMIL JESCHKE,-*
42 PUBLIC SQUARE.
And prosperity to c:T1 are OUf sentiments when we announce to the public the opening of our second
..,ear, Jan. 2 1889. Life scholarship until Jan. 10, $75. (Now is the time to save $25) U Money saved
IS money ea~ned." Come early and avoid the rush. Remember the" Modern Progressive" Euclid
Ave. Business College. larger than all others in Cleveland combined.
M. J. CATON, PRRS·T. 88-94 Euclid Ave.,
Telephone 536. Cleveland. Ohio.
and other papers delivered (ree.
....Also • large stocle of English School Boole. and School Statiooery, fiDe Wilhr Baek_,
Clothes Baskets and Hampers in endless variety.
12 TOWN TOPICS.
__=------ .X:: -- 5_-=-~=--
-=-._-,::::~-- ------
A LESSON IN BUGOLOGY.
WE SELL ONLY THE BEST GRADE OF
Respectfully,
--II &,iying special attention to-
AT SUMMER PRICES.
101 ST. CLAIR STREET.
346~ ERIE STREET,
BLACKSTONE BLOCK. CLEVELAND, O.
MME. HOW"LETTE,
M. A. HANNA. & CO.,
Hard Coal
Cloth and Tailor-Ma4e Suits, Cloaks and -Fancy Costumes..
IirTELEPHONE 597.
'54 Public Square, cor. Euclid Ave.
TO THE PUBLICI
The undersigned beg leave to announce
that they will open, on Monday next, at No.
11)4 Public Square, a first-class Merchant
Tailoring Establishment.
They will carry a full line of Imported
Woolens, of the finest fabrics, and will guar­antee
absolute satisfaction.
Mr. Ostendorf has for seven years been
associated with the D. Black Cloak Co., while
Mr. Haliburton was for a long time con­nected
with C. C. Lloyd & Co., late of this
city.
OSTENDORF & HALIBURTON,
WE HANDLE AND SELL THE CELEBRATED
CUTTER "WHISKEY.
LITHOGRAPHERS AND ENGRAVERS.
OLD" RICH, MELLOW. -Pronounced by experts to be THE BEST.
NATHAN IMPORTING CO.•
11aLBPHONE 814. 88 EUCLID AVJl,NuJ:.
DECEPTION, DINNER AND WEDDING CARDS elegantly engrued on .1Ie1t
• \ notice: Commercial work a s~ecialty. Lithographed catalorue. and finll co.r
- work In every branch of the LIthographer's Art.
8 'W1eeh[~ 'Re"lew of $oclet~, 8rt anb 1Llterature.
VOL. Ill.-No. 2. CLEVEVLAND, 0., JANUARY 12, 1889. PRICE, 5 CENTS.
Box Office open Sunday from 10 A. M. $12, $14 and $15 trousers offered at $8, $9, $10.
-AND-OPE~
H~~?~~;seeand Manager.
One week. Jan.•4_ Matinees, Wednesday and
Saturday.
,i\,CRu~9.N
LEADING- - - \
PHOTOGRAPHER,
DREW'S DIME MUSEUM.
Week commencing Monday, Jan. I", 1889l
Open from I to 5 and 7 to 10.
A Congress or ~itheWo.:'d';,t;~~s. A Hall Filled
Theo ISmith & Fuller I Jennie
In their Artistic and Comic Perfo:mances,
~ ATTORNEY AT LAW, [~
EDWARD S. MEYER.
.WiIl introduc~ Medleys, Song, Dance and skip­pine-
rope exerCises. The Popular Sketch Artists,
Tommy-HARRISES-Emma
The Ideal Irish Comedian,
MR. EDWIN HANFORD.
2-BIG STAGE SHOWS-2
10 Cents to all. • Children,s Cents.
211 SUPERIOR STREET.
~1ss Eella. EO'V\Ters
Expect absurdly improbable things of us and we have no
~AGEMAN
ABSOLUTE REDUCTIONS.
Every lot of interest to those who want to save money. Everybody
that, as it seems to delight them, all unmindful of the evident reaction,
who buys pleased, or they can get their money back. Profits sacri ficed
it is you've had so little confidence in them.
the gain comes to you, because we have too many. Our entire stock of
for the" day of reckoning" is sure to come, and then they'll wonder why
disappointed.
Says; "Expect very liberal things from us this month and you'll not be
encouragement to offer." LET OTHER FELLOWS continue to do
on trousers to measure. In buying this Fall we overshot the mark, and
CORSAIR
$20,000 Spectacular
Burlesqne,--The
OF
RICE'S
The Greatest Success
BILLNYE
lMODERN TIMES.
ILLUSTRATED BY
615-PROMINENT ARTISTS-615
RECORD-.so nights New York; '00 nights
Boston; 120 nights Chicago; 100
nights Philadelph.a.
(No increase in prices.)
Jan. 21-23-" Jim, the Penman." 24-26-Kel­logg
Opera Co.
]. Whitcomb Riley,
OPERA HOUSE,
Sunday Night, Jan. 13.
PALACE HOTEL,
43 WILSHIRE BUILDING.
GEO. GLANFIELD.
Livery and Boarding Stable.
142 SIBLEY. TELEPHONE 3095.
The atlenlion of travelers to the West is
respectfully directed to the
SAN FRANCISCO. CAL.
C. H. Livingstone, Manager.
Good accommodations ror boarding horses. Car...
riages and Coupes for operas, shopping, wed.
dings, calling, depots, etc., at very cheap rate•.
TAILORS, CLOTHIERS. 206 SUPERIOR STREET.
Next week-Among the Pines.
In their new h1usical Farce Comedy,
Th.ursday, Friday and Saturday,
MISS MADDERN.
L.A.TER OJ::.:T!
Pretty Girls I Topical Songs! Catchy Music!
Fascinating Dances I
HALLEN AND HART
PA~~ J~;'~2'~e:~ndManager. HUNDREDS OF STYLES TO MAKE CHOICE.
Three nights only, commencing Jan .•4. •
The great succeiS. The funniest play on the
American stage. H J wouldn't miss
it for nme dollars I"
THE POPULAR ARTISTS,
204 CEDAR AVENUE.
L. SMITHNIGHT 8: SON,
:..·..;····PHAiiMA"(~Y~ ..·;·..·1
.........................................................................
The Palace Hotel occupies an entire
block in Ihe center of San Francisco. It
is the model holel of the world. It is
Fire and ~arthquake proof. It has Five
Elevalors. Every room is large, light
and airy. The venlilation is perfect. A
balh and closet adjoin every room. All
rooms are easy of access from broad, light
corridors. The central court, illuminated
by the electric light, its immense glass
roof, its broad balconies, its carriage-way, ­and
ils tropical plants, are features
hilherto unknown in American hotels.
Guests enterlained on either the American
or European plan. The restaurant is the
finest in the city.
r SEALS, BADGES,
J. H. FLEHARTY &: CO.
Rubber Stamps/Steel St...p..
Stencils( Burn.ne Braa"', .
A phabets, etc.
9~ Seneca Street, CLltVItLoUlD, 0
l
* CANNEL
-FOR-SOLD
ONLY BY
GRATES.
KENTUCKY
The Rhodes & Beidler Coal Co. I
Mell· FRENCH At SHAW'S. 1 Inery ~~~~:;IC 91 Euclid Ave.
P. CENTEMERI &. CO:S KID GLOVE AGENCY.
"''''DOT.. ''''
OR, THE" AVENGER'S OATH."
In Charles P. Brown's Western Romance,
Next week-Edwin Arden, in H Barred out:'
FLORENCE]. BINDLEY,
COLU':~~~P~~L~~~~:~er.
POPULAR} 15. 20, 30 and SOc.
PRICES. -NO HIGHER.-
Last Perrormance, this Sunday Evening or
HARRY WILLIAMS'
Own Specialty Company.
The Columbia Theater will be closed the first
three nights of next week. Thursday, Friday,
Saturday,Sunday eveninls and Saturday matinee.
'J:'. ~. P.A.E~ON"
In Joe Murphy's great Irish comedy,
CC :EK:EI~~."
Week of ]an.2s-James Connor Roach, in unan
Darcy." .
...__H. R. JACOBS'--.
CLE~~;t~~s~~eE~;:~~rop.
The only theatre in this city playing Itertinl
attractions at popular prices. Matine~,Tuesday,
Wednesda.y, and Saturday. Box office always
open.-Week commencing Monday, Jan. 14, 188g.
The Talented Young Artiste,
TOW'N .TOPICS.
\ -
WE SELL ONLY THE EEST GRADE OF
HardCoal
AT SUMMER PRICES.
M. A. HANNA & CO.,
Harrison -Many Lighting
COMPANY,
--CONTRACTORS FOR--
LIGHTING
THE STREETS OF CITIES AND TOWNS.
MANUFACTURERS OF
Vapor Gas Burners, Fixtures, Torches, Gaso­line
and Oil Stoves, and all kinds of
Street Lanterns for Gas, Gas-oline
and Kerosene.
....WRITE FOR CIRCULARS AND PRICES."
13. to 23 Davies St., - CLEVELAND, O.
'~-lY TIl:LICPBON'" ,.072.
Ilif'"TELEPHONE 597. 101 ST. CLAIR STREET. H. M. CLAFLEN, PRES.
BLACKSTONE BLOCK. CLEVELAND. O.
LITHOGRAPHERS AND ENGRAVERS.
DECEPTION, DINNER AND WEDDING CARDS elegantly engraved on short
I \ notice. Commercial work a specialty. Lithographed catalogues and fine color
work in every branch of the Lithographer's Art.
* GET -T~:E J3EE.T. *
ALL THE LATEST DESIGNS IN
WEDDING, INVITATION, NEW YEARS' CARDS, CALLING CARDS,
INVITATIONS AND PROGRAMMES OF ALL KINDS.
U A person is known by the way they present themselves,"
CLAB-LEN PAVING CO.
Office, 29 .Euclid Ave" OLEVELAND, O.
PAVING * CONTRACTORS.
Medina Block Stone Pavement a Specialty.
QUARRIES AT ALBION. N. Y.
MME. HO"WLETTE,
346~ ERIE STREET,
--Is giving special attention to-
IS IN THE
CO-OPERATIVE CLUBS
T. C. SCHENCK & CO.. - 10 Court Place. (Rear of Park Theatre). Cloth and Tailor-Made Suits, Cloaks and Fancy Costumes.
PRACTICAL BOOK AND JOB PRINTERS.
,. THE BEST WAY
Frazee s WoodbIne Laundry. TO GET A FIRST-CLASS WATCH
With new machinery. With skilled labor.
With everything in shape to do the best of work.
-A TRIAL IS ALL WE ASK.-
~MERCHANTSI~
We make a specialty of FINE AND ARTISTIC PRINTING.
and take pains with any class of work, no matter how small or how
large. It will not cost you any more to have your STATIONERY
printed in Fine and Attractive Style.
123 BANK STREET.
BLANK
TELEPHONE 2215.
BOOKS
-OF-J.
T. Ainsworth Watch Olub Co.
FINE ~ATCHES
A~ATS~Ep~~~~~T } ONLY $1.00 A "WEEK.
ROOMS 31 AND 32, 117 PUBLIC SQUARE.
WE HANDLE AND SELL THE CELEBRATED
CUTTER WHISKEY.
MANUFACTURED TO ORDER.
OLD, RICH, l\IELLOW. Pronounced by experts to be THE BEST.
NATHAN IMPORTING CO.,
TELEPHONE 8!l4. 88 EUCliD AVENUE.
.otir PLEASE GIVE US A CALL. ""a
MISS BROOKS.
LITHOGRAPH BUILDING,
COR. ST. CLAIR AND WOOD STREETS.
IlirTELEPHONE 852.
Ladies, you can save money, and at the same time obtain a perfect fit and a better
made garment by getting your NEWMARKET of MISS BROOKS, who, this season,
is not only prepared to make, but to furnish them complete, at a price lower than the
ready-made garment can be bought. Call and see different styles.
ROOMS. '7 AND .8 NOTTINGHAM BUILDING,
Opposite Euclid Avenue Opera House. A Euclid Avenue. Elevator.
B 'Wleehll? 'Re"lew of Socletl?, Brt anb '.literature.
VOL. IlL-No.2.
JUBILATE.
We're going to have a City Hall I
Proclaim it (rom the belfry tall,
Halloo it madly through the street,
A nd tell it to each man you meet.
'Tis a bit of news we prize,-
For a city of our size,
Using thus a rented place,
Crowns itself with rank disgrace.
Hail, Detroit, lluffalo,
ScotTs and sneers no longer go !
Soon you'll sec a placard set
On the old" hall" high-" To LET I"
Editor Keffer, of the East End Sigual, has a remarkable
faculty of saying a nice thing and following it up with
an unpleasant poke. He took occasion the other day to
compliment TOWN TOPICS upon its Holiday issue. That
was a nice thing to do. In the next line he went on to
say that in advocating the federal plan, this paper is
actuated by the fact that its editors are Democrats. Just
how Mr. Keffer arrived at that conclusion is a mystery,
but admitting for the sake of argument that his premise
is correct, it does not follow by a great.jug·ful that there
is anything wrong with the federal plan because it is ad·
vocated by Democrats. Mr. Keffer's success in conduct·
ing the East End Signal is due to the application to his
business of the federal plan. As far as the Signal is con·
cerned, he is the Mogul. He appoints his reporters, his
business manager, his foreman, his solicitors, and if they
do not ~uit him, he does not hesitate an instant in dis·
charging them. And yet there may be a printer or two
in his employ, who, on being fired, for cause,may rise lip
in his might and with becoming solemnity ask: "Shall
we have a king?"
As with most things relating to the comfort and con·
ditio~ of the people, the city of Cleveland is away be·
hind, and so it comes that travelers are under the disa·
greeable necessity, when arriving and departing,ofmaking.
their way to all manne.. "f railway dep";., Sl me of which
are hardly accessible by reason of their 10ca'lOn, except
by private conveyances; and in the case of thue who are
unable to pay for such conveyances, by hoofing it. The
fast trains of the Lake Shore Road, notably the vestibule
trains, arrive and {'epart in the middle of the night,
when there is little chance for outgoing passengers to
get a car that reaches within a block of the depot, while
arrivals must necessary plod up the hill and reach their
homes as best they can. There is an imperative demand
for a depot at the foot of Willson avenue, where resi­dents,
in arriving or departing, may have an oppt,rtunity
of reaching their homes without being compelled to sub­mit
to the extortions of hackmen, or else undertake a
two hours' walk. A depot at the foot of Willson avenue
would do much to improve the popularity of the Lake
Shore road, and if any road needs such an improvement,
it is the Lake Shore.
A Superior street busll1ess man recently attended an
operatic performance which, in quality, was not con·
ducive to a peaceful frame of mind. Returning thus
with his wife to his East End residence late in the even.
ing, he made the discovery that his keys were quietly
res~ing iu the pocket of his other trousers. He then
rang the bell; he rang it again; he rang until his arm·
ached. But the two servants slept the sleep of the just.
His next move was ·to secure a club in the rear of the
house with which he sma~hed a basement window. He
was in that' frame 'oj, mind which dill not make him
CLEVELAND, 0., JANUARY 12, 1889.
economical in the way of noise. Climbing in, he found
himself balked again, the door to the upper part of the
house being fastened on the other side. He went at it,
however, and eventually the door gave way before his
vigorous and resounding blows. Then, admitting his
wife through the front door, he immediately retired, be­ing
too thoroughly provoked to stop to .. pick up the
pieces." The next thing he knew a shrill cry pierced
the air, and a servant shouted at the door of the sleeping
apartment in agitated tones: "Oh, Mr, --, somebody
broke into the house last night. The ,,.inJows and the
doors are all smashed!" The man of the house didn't
scare much, however, being on intimate terms with the
burglar. Strange as it may seem, neither a nei~hbor nor
a policeman heard the noise attendant upon the "burg­lary,"
nor did the latter in the course of the night ob­serve
anything wrong about the house. When a man
without practice in the" art of burgling," and endowed
with strength and energy, can break into his own house,
in a noisy fashion, too, without disturbing anyone with­in
or without, is it surprising that professionals meet
success in their midnight maraudings?
The East Cleveland road evidently grades its ·patrons
into three distinct classes, somewhat after the notion of
European railways. The Euclid avenue passengers cor­respond
with the first class, the Cedar avenue folks rank
second, while the Garden street people rank as th~
rankest of all, and take a seat, when they get one, way
in the rear. The Euclid avenue cars are rUll with suffi­cient
frequency to meet the demand, and the rolling
stock is the best to had in the land. Cedar avenue is
stocked with the old Euclid avenue cars, and as a rule,
during the busy hours of the day, the people hang on by
their eyebrows in lieu of the missing straps. It remains
for Garden street to illustrate the utter misery into which
a man may be plunged when at the mercy of a corpora­tion
which to all complaints makes this sweeping, if not
satisfactory, answer, .. what are you going to do about
it?" It may be that the company owes the Garden
street people a grudge for trying to dispute its right to
the street in fee simple, but that should have no bearing
upon any non-residents, who are compelled to use the
Garden street cars. Out of the whole equipment there
are but four new cars, just as though to show what the
company might do, if it were willing. The rest of the
rolling stock may be compared to dilapidated box stalls,
and a ride in one of them is a source of the keenest tor­ture
to the person compelled to undergo the ordeal.
It would look to the local Zaccheus as if Captain Gary
is prett